"Well you could run out into the woods to hide, and then he may go looking for you and that's precisely when a masked killer will spring out of a cabin we've all somehow missed and try to murder him. So it's probably best you just go to the dance. For Malcolm's safety."

He smooths out his clothes, instinctively going to fix the tie that isn't there. Sigh.

"It will be fine. We have every confidence in you."

With wingmen like this how can you go wrong?