"I'm lucky," Crichton says, though that seems like such an odd thing to say after such a confession. "Because I... I have better friends than I deserved."

His fingers clench around Arthur but he plows on, needing to just bring the words up hard and fast like verbal vomit.

"I got her back. I got my Aeryn back. Zhaan, one of my crew mates, she used her own life energy to pull Aeryn back into life. I don't know how but I didn't... I didn't care. I had her back and that's all that mattered. But it cost Zhaan everything. She traded her on lifetime for Aeryn. That was my fault too." His fault for being obsessed with wormholes, putting Moya and everyone in danger, forcing Zhaan to make that choice. He'll always regret this.

"As for Harvey I... I tried to dig him out. I went to a brain surgeon. He cut the chip out but... it didn't work. He's somehow just part of me now. I didn't think it was possible to get away from him."

Sick game indeed. And yet, there's a part of him that is almost grateful that he's finally free from Harvey. It only took losing everything else.