Jeff Calhoun (
cacophonish) wrote in
come_sailaway2022-06-04 11:16 pm
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i'm feeling devious, you're looking glamorous | OPEN
WHO: Jeff & OPEN
WHEN: June 1 - June 10
WHERE: Random cabins, every bar, the buffet, idk basically anywhere
SUMMARY: A messy new arrival hits the ground, uh... stumbling to rock bottom. I swear he'll chill out after this.
WARNINGS: Binge drinking, references to demons, possession, trauma, and death. Oh and Billy Joel slander.
So, like...
All things considered, Jeff thinks he's taking this pretty well. Obviously, he's majorly fucking dead, which is about what he expected after performing the ritual to give his body over to a demon. And, okay, so the afterlife is a cruise ship in the middle of the ocean, and that's, like, really not his scene, but it's better than the big empty void of oblivion he'd been expecting, so... Things are already looking up.
Look at him. He's chill. He's copacetic. He's not freaking out about anything at all.
After the mandatory safety drills are done, you can find Jeff all over the Serena Eterna, exploring all the fine shops and amenities the ship has to offer.
i. bar hopping...
ii. strange bedfellows...
iii. breakfast of champions...
iv. wildcard...
WHEN: June 1 - June 10
WHERE: Random cabins, every bar, the buffet, idk basically anywhere
SUMMARY: A messy new arrival hits the ground, uh... stumbling to rock bottom. I swear he'll chill out after this.
WARNINGS: Binge drinking, references to demons, possession, trauma, and death. Oh and Billy Joel slander.
So, like...
All things considered, Jeff thinks he's taking this pretty well. Obviously, he's majorly fucking dead, which is about what he expected after performing the ritual to give his body over to a demon. And, okay, so the afterlife is a cruise ship in the middle of the ocean, and that's, like, really not his scene, but it's better than the big empty void of oblivion he'd been expecting, so... Things are already looking up.
Look at him. He's chill. He's copacetic. He's not freaking out about anything at all.
After the mandatory safety drills are done, you can find Jeff all over the Serena Eterna, exploring all the fine shops and amenities the ship has to offer.
i. bar hopping...
...fuck it, okay, fine, he's bar hopping. That's all he's doing. Look, there's a lot of places to get a drink here, and Jeff's a connoisseur of self destruction and debauchery, and besides, he's already dead, so it's not like he has any reason to sober up now.
So, really, if you stop by any bar on the ship, you're likely to run into Jeff there at some point or another, in various states of intoxication. Maybe he's holding a one-sided conversation with an indifferent ghost at the poolside bar, while it blends him a daiquiri. Maybe he's singing to himself and anyone around him at Hurrikane-- hey, wait, did a cocktail napkin spontaneously burst into flames while he was singing? Maybe he's dancing with anyone who's got the misfortune of being at Rischie at the same time as him. Or maybe he's grooving alone at John's, to the beat of some song in his head, stopping to hurl expletives at the ghostly piano player as it launches into its set. "Fuuuuuck you, Piano Man. Billy Joel's a hack. Ha... ha... Fuck. Billy Joel. I'm in hell..."
The ghost of the piano man doesn't even care. Somehow, the indifference stings.
ii. strange bedfellows...
Big messy breakdowns can take a lot out of a guy. Not that Jeff's having a breakdown. It's just a general observation, about breakdowns in general, for other people. Jeff's fine, after all. He's just having a good time.
But sooner or later, thatbreakdowngood time starts to take its toll, and Jeff's gotta crawl back to his cabin to sleep it off. The only thing is, he doesn't actually remember his cabin number. It's... 123, right? No. Wait. 113. 102... He knows for a fact it starts with a 1.
(What do you mean every cabin starts with a 1?)
Eventually, Jeff finds his way back to his cabin, or at least what he thinks is his cabin. Maybe it's actually your cabin, in which case: if you left the door unlocked, he's definitely going to stumble in and zonk out on one of the beds, thinking it's his. Total Goldilocks move. If it's locked, well, he'll just slump down in front of the door and sleep the booze off there, in the hall. You might have to step over him, or just wake him up.
iii. breakfast of champions...
Decked out in Tommy Bahama, with sunglasses perched in his hair, Jeff looks like he's finally settling into the cruise life... as he groans and slumps his head down on a table at the buffet, a plate of untouched food beside him. What's the point of hangovers in the afterlife?
"'s not fair. I wanna diiiie..." he whines into the table, as if this hangover is, truly, the worst hangover anyone's suffered, ever, in the history of the universe. If you join him, Jeff will lift his head and look absolutely pitiful. For as much of a mess as he is, he really has mastered the art of puppy dog eyes. Somehow, he actually manages to look like some kind of innocent Disney princess decked out in Tommy Bahama.
"I don't think I'm doing so good right now," he confesses.
Fine. Okay. So maybe Jeff isn't taking any of this well at all.
iv. wildcard...
go wild, throw anything at me. hit me atweeyotch or weeyotch#8200 if you want to plot something in particular!
no subject
He immediately presses it to his cheek, then just kind of leans into his own touch, and it's hard to say if he's enjoying the sensation, or just needs the help keeping his head up.
"Had a bit of a..." Year? Something like that. But with the way he trails off instead of finishing the thought, it sounds more like he's just repeating the man like a slurring parrot. "Jeff."
He tries to smile and gives a weak little wave with his free hand.
no subject
He's offended on behalf of corporeal bartenders everywhere.
no subject
Jeff shrugs a shoulder. "Mm, nah.... This is about it." He gestures to himself. "The whole fucked up package."
It should've been said like a joke, but it's not. Johnny's not missing anything, really. This is Jeff in his natural state.
"Water, um.... yeah. That'd be good. Thanks, man."
no subject
"Are you planning to do this regularly? Just so I know."
no subject
"Planning, like..." He looks around the room and gestures. "To crash here? Nah..."
To get this drunk again and again and again? Well... Jeff doesn't exactly plan anything when it comes to binging and dancing on the edge of self destruction.
"I mean, like, I dunno, when it comes to anything... I'm just winging it."
no subject