Skulduggery Pleasant (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
light_mischief) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
come_sailaway2022-06-25 12:26 am
light_mischief) wrote in come_sailaway2022-06-25 12:26 am
[open] automated vacation message
Who: Skulduggery Pleasant and...??? You. Definitely you. Really you, right?
What: After his canon-jump and the confirmation that like, technically he is both real and unreal, Skulduggery has decided he is mentally checking out for the week. Yep, definitely an appropriate coping mechanism that will not backfire continuously and spectacularly.
When: After the camping trip through the last week of June!
Where: Tommy Bahama, Karaoke, the pool, also far away from it all
Warnings: Auditory & visual hallucinations, probably talk of extensive torture, eldritch madness, and general trauma. Some violence is possible/probable.
Notes: See this post for an idea of how Skulduggery might be different post-canon jump! New CR will be more likely to see a balanced, "regular" Skulduggery (since his hallucinations are strictly people he knows), while his current CR might notice him avoiding direct communication until he can prove you're really there. He might also try to throw things at you. You know, it's fine.
(I'll match tagging style!)
[locked to Darcy] I know what I think doesn't matter anymore, but I'd say his mind is gone
[It takes Skulduggery approximately an hour after his conversation with the captain before he starts to have a complete and total meltdown about it. Not that he would classify it as such; no, this is just... a period of adjustment to new facts. He tries his best to write it all down before he forgets, but the more he thinks about it the less sense it makes and --
It takes him almost a full day to get some sort of grip on himself, and in that time he comes up with what may be the stupidest plan he's ever had. Well, the stupidest plan he's ever had thus far. If reality is burning him out, then he simply must not engage with it any more than strictly necessary. That, he figures, is as close to a vacation as one can get aboard this godforsaken ship, and that's just what he needs.
That means: no theorizing, plotting or hypothesizing about current or future affairs; no concerted efforts to solve any problems; no worrying about the captain's plans or personhood or name or anything; and most importantly, no taking things too seriously.
But to do it all, he unfortunately must break the last rule almost immediately. There is an unfortunate side-effect to his sudden temporal upheaval that must be dealt with, first.
The gauntlets haven't changed since he last laid eyes on them, but he has. There's a distant singing sensation in the base of his skull now when he touches them, like a finger along the rim of a champagne glass. He wraps them tight in a towel. Doesn't help. Stuffs the towel in a bag. Still doesn't help. Just being in the room with them is enough to feel it. Throwing them overboard isn't an option; he can't guarantee who will find them. The only choice he has, as far as he can see, is to find someone he trusts to hide them for him. Somewhere he'll never be able to go, or never think to look.
Skulduggery takes the bag, wraps it in yet another towel, and avoids the mirror on his way out. No need to look at himself to recognize the guilt already brewing at putting this burden on somebody else. Maybe it wouldn't sting as much if he were handing them over to Jade, or Palamedes -- but the former would put the pieces together too quickly, and the latter would likely wind up hurting himself. Darcy, he surmises, has no necromancy in her background, and therefore is unlikely to draw even the slightest energy from the cold, dead metal.
She's going to ask a lot of questions, and he'll have to lie to her face about most of it, but at least he can trust her to help. He just has to hope that she's actually in her cabin when he comes knocking.]
1. [tommy bahama] There was a reason why I came here (but I guess now it doesn't matter)
[There is a six-foot-four skeleton in a full suit somewhere inside the Tommy Bahama. You can't see him from the front of the shop, but if you walk the rows long enough -- maybe fifteen, thirty minutes down the aisle -- you're bound to come across Skulduggery. He seems to be browsing the shirts at first glance, but his movements are a bit... Stilted. He doesn't react to any of the patterns or the quiet muzak or the fake lime scent pumped into the store. Truthfully, he isn't even aware of how far into the store he's gotten. He'd been mostly trying to outpace the obnoxious Valkyrie hallucination following him, laughing at the ugly shirts he's pretending to look at. She's the only other voice in the shop, which makes her the one thing ruining this place from being truly peaceful. The silence, the solitude... if he could destroy the speakers, it would be perfect.
"Oh my God," Valkyrie says, "You are totally pathetic. Do you really think a sunhat is going to fix all of this?"
Yes, actually. Skulduggery does think a sunhat will fix things. For one thing, he can throw them at the bothersome figment. For another, he's now left a trail of various hats and pieces of clothing as a trail for him to follow back to the front. (Or, perhaps, for other people to find him...)]
2. [chatterbox] There is a certain kind of feeling that you get, when you're totally helpless
[Karaoke seems to be limited to a single hour every night, but Skulduggery doesn't want to wait for nine PM. He doesn't have time to sit around waiting for things to happen. He needs to be throwing himself into this vacation of his full force, and no semi-sentient teleprompter is going to stand in the way of his good time, damn it.
Skulduggery sits on top of the karaoke machine itself, having the monitor pulled up right in front of him for easy access. He sits in silence a lot for somebody who's supposedly trying to sing, flipping through the catalog seemingly at random. In the audience, he only has to worry about China, who smiles and hums What is Life Without a Wife. She only stops when he uses the ship's translator to translate some of the now-dead language he'd learned. Mostly, that just leaves him shouting things like "Help, help," and "The pain is everlasting," into a silent room. But that's okay. It's fine. Now he knows what those words meant when they were being shouted at him by survivors of a now-dead alien race. The more you know!
When he does sing, he throws his chest into it, so to speak, and for what it's worth, it does seem that he's having a good time. Every time the machine tries to rattle like it might return to its closet, Skulduggery reaches down and punches the side to get it to stop. The truth is, Skulduggery is holding the damned thing hostage. And he knows it. Which is why he will occasionally hit it extra hard and mention,] I will set you ablaze, you know.
[It seems to do the trick.]
3. [the pool] I had a good, good, good, good reason (but I guess now you couldn't care)
[The only one of Gordon Edgley's books that Skulduggery can find is The Vanishing Knight, which is a fun story about teleporters and based loosely on Skulduggery's knowledge of the Grotesquery. Now that he's gotten a little more real-world experience with both matters, he's decided to settle in by the pool and do a little post-humous editing. This issue's got some simple grammatical mistakes, and Gordon always tended toward rambling sentences; on top of that, he certainly took some artistic liberties with the way things were handled.
Interestingly enough, despite being a normally chatty friend, Gordon is a quiet sort of figment beside him, just there to listen and silently chuckle at Skulduggery's asides. He thinks maybe he's just worried he won't be able to get Gordon's voice quite right. That's fine, though; Gordon's a nice, comfortable presence to have lingering around. He doesn't complain, not even as Skulduggery gets lost in rambling asides that are half-spoken and half-thought. This might as well be the closest to self-care Skulduggerys gotten in either a week or a year, depending on which angle you come at it.
He's wearing his suit, but of course, the hat has been replaced by a Tommy Bahama sunhat. Valkyrie has not bothered him once since he put it on, and so as far as he's concerned, this is his new look.]
[wildcard] I got pressure bearing down on me
(Have something in mind? Message me or just throw something up and see what happens!)
What: After his canon-jump and the confirmation that like, technically he is both real and unreal, Skulduggery has decided he is mentally checking out for the week. Yep, definitely an appropriate coping mechanism that will not backfire continuously and spectacularly.
When: After the camping trip through the last week of June!
Where: Tommy Bahama, Karaoke, the pool, also far away from it all
Warnings: Auditory & visual hallucinations, probably talk of extensive torture, eldritch madness, and general trauma. Some violence is possible/probable.
Notes: See this post for an idea of how Skulduggery might be different post-canon jump! New CR will be more likely to see a balanced, "regular" Skulduggery (since his hallucinations are strictly people he knows), while his current CR might notice him avoiding direct communication until he can prove you're really there. He might also try to throw things at you. You know, it's fine.
(I'll match tagging style!)
[locked to Darcy] I know what I think doesn't matter anymore, but I'd say his mind is gone
[It takes Skulduggery approximately an hour after his conversation with the captain before he starts to have a complete and total meltdown about it. Not that he would classify it as such; no, this is just... a period of adjustment to new facts. He tries his best to write it all down before he forgets, but the more he thinks about it the less sense it makes and --
It takes him almost a full day to get some sort of grip on himself, and in that time he comes up with what may be the stupidest plan he's ever had. Well, the stupidest plan he's ever had thus far. If reality is burning him out, then he simply must not engage with it any more than strictly necessary. That, he figures, is as close to a vacation as one can get aboard this godforsaken ship, and that's just what he needs.
That means: no theorizing, plotting or hypothesizing about current or future affairs; no concerted efforts to solve any problems; no worrying about the captain's plans or personhood or name or anything; and most importantly, no taking things too seriously.
But to do it all, he unfortunately must break the last rule almost immediately. There is an unfortunate side-effect to his sudden temporal upheaval that must be dealt with, first.
The gauntlets haven't changed since he last laid eyes on them, but he has. There's a distant singing sensation in the base of his skull now when he touches them, like a finger along the rim of a champagne glass. He wraps them tight in a towel. Doesn't help. Stuffs the towel in a bag. Still doesn't help. Just being in the room with them is enough to feel it. Throwing them overboard isn't an option; he can't guarantee who will find them. The only choice he has, as far as he can see, is to find someone he trusts to hide them for him. Somewhere he'll never be able to go, or never think to look.
Skulduggery takes the bag, wraps it in yet another towel, and avoids the mirror on his way out. No need to look at himself to recognize the guilt already brewing at putting this burden on somebody else. Maybe it wouldn't sting as much if he were handing them over to Jade, or Palamedes -- but the former would put the pieces together too quickly, and the latter would likely wind up hurting himself. Darcy, he surmises, has no necromancy in her background, and therefore is unlikely to draw even the slightest energy from the cold, dead metal.
She's going to ask a lot of questions, and he'll have to lie to her face about most of it, but at least he can trust her to help. He just has to hope that she's actually in her cabin when he comes knocking.]
1. [tommy bahama] There was a reason why I came here (but I guess now it doesn't matter)
[There is a six-foot-four skeleton in a full suit somewhere inside the Tommy Bahama. You can't see him from the front of the shop, but if you walk the rows long enough -- maybe fifteen, thirty minutes down the aisle -- you're bound to come across Skulduggery. He seems to be browsing the shirts at first glance, but his movements are a bit... Stilted. He doesn't react to any of the patterns or the quiet muzak or the fake lime scent pumped into the store. Truthfully, he isn't even aware of how far into the store he's gotten. He'd been mostly trying to outpace the obnoxious Valkyrie hallucination following him, laughing at the ugly shirts he's pretending to look at. She's the only other voice in the shop, which makes her the one thing ruining this place from being truly peaceful. The silence, the solitude... if he could destroy the speakers, it would be perfect.
"Oh my God," Valkyrie says, "You are totally pathetic. Do you really think a sunhat is going to fix all of this?"
Yes, actually. Skulduggery does think a sunhat will fix things. For one thing, he can throw them at the bothersome figment. For another, he's now left a trail of various hats and pieces of clothing as a trail for him to follow back to the front. (Or, perhaps, for other people to find him...)]
2. [chatterbox] There is a certain kind of feeling that you get, when you're totally helpless
[Karaoke seems to be limited to a single hour every night, but Skulduggery doesn't want to wait for nine PM. He doesn't have time to sit around waiting for things to happen. He needs to be throwing himself into this vacation of his full force, and no semi-sentient teleprompter is going to stand in the way of his good time, damn it.
Skulduggery sits on top of the karaoke machine itself, having the monitor pulled up right in front of him for easy access. He sits in silence a lot for somebody who's supposedly trying to sing, flipping through the catalog seemingly at random. In the audience, he only has to worry about China, who smiles and hums What is Life Without a Wife. She only stops when he uses the ship's translator to translate some of the now-dead language he'd learned. Mostly, that just leaves him shouting things like "Help, help," and "The pain is everlasting," into a silent room. But that's okay. It's fine. Now he knows what those words meant when they were being shouted at him by survivors of a now-dead alien race. The more you know!
When he does sing, he throws his chest into it, so to speak, and for what it's worth, it does seem that he's having a good time. Every time the machine tries to rattle like it might return to its closet, Skulduggery reaches down and punches the side to get it to stop. The truth is, Skulduggery is holding the damned thing hostage. And he knows it. Which is why he will occasionally hit it extra hard and mention,] I will set you ablaze, you know.
[It seems to do the trick.]
3. [the pool] I had a good, good, good, good reason (but I guess now you couldn't care)
[The only one of Gordon Edgley's books that Skulduggery can find is The Vanishing Knight, which is a fun story about teleporters and based loosely on Skulduggery's knowledge of the Grotesquery. Now that he's gotten a little more real-world experience with both matters, he's decided to settle in by the pool and do a little post-humous editing. This issue's got some simple grammatical mistakes, and Gordon always tended toward rambling sentences; on top of that, he certainly took some artistic liberties with the way things were handled.
Interestingly enough, despite being a normally chatty friend, Gordon is a quiet sort of figment beside him, just there to listen and silently chuckle at Skulduggery's asides. He thinks maybe he's just worried he won't be able to get Gordon's voice quite right. That's fine, though; Gordon's a nice, comfortable presence to have lingering around. He doesn't complain, not even as Skulduggery gets lost in rambling asides that are half-spoken and half-thought. This might as well be the closest to self-care Skulduggerys gotten in either a week or a year, depending on which angle you come at it.
He's wearing his suit, but of course, the hat has been replaced by a Tommy Bahama sunhat. Valkyrie has not bothered him once since he put it on, and so as far as he's concerned, this is his new look.]
[wildcard] I got pressure bearing down on me
(Have something in mind? Message me or just throw something up and see what happens!)
no subject
That's irrelevant, because it's not going to be needed anyway. Naturally. ....Probably.
(Hopefully.)]
Just three questions, yes. [No extra parts, no nested inquiries--insofar as he can manage, anyway. Jade dips his head in a slight and prompt sort of nod.] To start...while I imagine eleven months' worth of new memories has likely dilated your sense of chronology quite a bit. If you were to think back, as best you can--was there anything at all unusual that happened to you here, right before finding yourself gaining new memories? Odd encounters or any strangeness in your surroundings... [Any warning signs at all in general, really?]
no subject
Mundane. Nothing out of the ordinary. I was... walking, I think. But nothing unusual occurred.
no subject
[Well, that's unfortunate--in several senses of the word, really. Not exactly reassuring, that something like this could probably happen at any given time without so much as a hint of warning. Jade takes a moment's visible pause to mull over this, a slight frown finally settling upon his features.]
Fair enough, then. ...So, if I parsed your message correctly, I'd like to confirm: your additional memories contain time spent...back in your own reality, presumably. If it were a continuation directly from your last memory before arriving on this ship the first time--do the new memories contain no awareness at all of your previous experiences on the ship, then? A seamless transition, as if your ship venture never occurred between them...so to speak.
no subject
Correct. [On its surface, anyway. Enough for the knee-jerk confirmation, at least, until he realizes that doesn't encompass the whole.] No. Wait. Our memories occur concurrently with our existence here. The things that happened to me are still happening to me, just a different me. I think.
[It's very confusing and his mind is essentially a slice of eldritch swiss cheese. This is exactly why he's trying not to think about it!]
no subject
But then he's going on to answer the second question, and well--speaking of existential things--]
...Concurrently. [Jade blinks, as this actually sinks in.] But that would mean--that it was never a matter of time being stopped in our realities, while we're here. That time is in fact still ongoing, there... [...Jade had been functioning somewhat under an (immensely-scaled) Time Stop theory, in a more optimistic sort of bent, ever since Friday had answered his inquiry on this particular matter in a vague way back at the sticker party. But if this isn't actually the case, and it's more like that...then, in reality, they're still home too? --No, not quite. A different me, Skulduggery says. Much the same way it had been mentioned at scattered points in his text, too, and Jade has to pause again to really try and think on this. ...This would imply, then, that there are--multiple versions of any given person, in existence, all at once?
Oh, out of his field. Very out of his field. It's the only interpretation that makes sense, though, if he applies it to Skulduggery's words and what he seems to be trying to convey.]
This must be another component of 'multiple realities'. ...I suppose nobody ever did say things had to be limited to just one unique reality apiece, for any given place...or that a timeline couldn't be layered in a similar way. If 'layered' would even be the right term... [Where is a spatial specialist when they need one! Where!! Jade sighs a bit, shaking his head as if to set aside his own woefully inadequate wording, and refocuses upon Skulduggery with a frown that deepens.] Still, if we are all indeed now in a separate...layer, of time, on this ship--that doesn't explain how you ended up with those memories. Not just memories, either, but a physical alteration as well. ...Assuming your new skull was an occurrence over the course of your new memories, in itself.
[A full-body swap, in a single instance? ...If it was a swap at all? The memories are apparently additive, though, stacked upon his existing ones of the ship. ...Then, was it more like a transformation? There's no answer that isn't alarming in its own sort of way, here, and even if he weren't limited to just three questions to begin with--Jade's not sure he'd want to fish Skulduggery for any of his own ideas on that front anyway. Considering how he's now living the result, regardless of the method...
If there was any method to it at all, for that matter?]
But the captain claims even he doesn't know what happened, according to your message...that's unusual. One would think this is the sort of feat he'd be happy to take credit for, if it were intentional.
no subject
And yet he's also here. Trapped outside of time and maybe trapping more of himself here with every passing event. He still doesn't know what happens to the versions of himself who he's taken memories from. He has no idea how much he's truly taken from himself. He knows the memories aren't his own, but is the skull? It is his skull, after all, but not one he himself found.
The more Jade talks, the more he extrapolates, the worse it feels. He isn't an expert on these kinds of things to begin with, and the fact that the captain seemed equally in the dark about it...]
Well, he didn't. [Weirdly defensive, but okay...] He has no control over it. Over any of it. He doesn't choose who gets taken aboard and he doesn't choose when this happens. We're as stuck here as he is. Because, regardless of the new skull, I never left.
[He pulls up his left sleeve to reveal Darcy's friendship bracelet still tied on tight, with the same complicated knot he'd made at the dance. It's possibly the only reason he hasn't been mostly catatonic since finding out there are other versions of himself. It reminds him that he's real, and that he hasn't inherited the ship as memories from yet another version of himself.
("Oh, so I don't exist because I never made you something," Valkyrie says, having come close enough to hear even as she stands well out of range of his hat. Skulduggery dips his chin slightly to avoid having to look at her. The answer, he's afraid to admit, is yes.)]
no subject
A truly poorly practitioner this man is turning out to be--dabbling in powers he increasingly only seems to understand on a surface level...
[Flavored with a fair amount of ire, this bit; Jade may not possess untold reality-bending abilities at his own fingertips, perhaps, but he does at least understand the finest intricacies of the fonic artes he uses--which is more than can apparently be said of the captain and his own capabilities. He feels quite at liberty to judge at this point, alright!
...Anyway though. Anyway. Not much point in lingering upon that in the end, after all...Jade's glance drops to Skulduggery's wrist at the movement, the reveal of the bracelet underneath the sleeve. The significance of it alongside his words doesn't take much time to sink in; he might not know that it was a gift from someone here specifically, but Jade does recognize the fibers making up the braiding as being part of the craft supplies back during the camping expedition.]
No...it would seem you didn't--if you were wearing that before it happened. Whatever occurred, then...crossed over from elsewhere, it would seem. Added to you as you've been, here, somehow.
[Maybe at the expense of that other Skulduggery in turn--or maybe not. It's really pretty much impossible to say, isn't it? ...Jade can't help but wonder, though, if it's entirely a one-way process. If, perhaps, the reverse could occur as well--or even be invoked--
More hypotheticals...more things he'd like to discuss with someone, really, except--it can't exactly be with Skulduggery at the moment, now can it? Here they are, two questions in, and Skulduggery's mood has not seemed to ease one bit. Though that's quite fair enough, really, considering the nature of the entire subject...especially when Jade can provide no better answers to any of it himself, at present. Another pause falls, then, this one rather longer than all the others--in which Jade peers pensively at the way Skulduggery drops his chin just so, his overall distracted and thoroughly unhappy sort of air. ...There really are a myriad of other questions he'd like to ask, across a whole spectrum of practicality. He ought to choose well, to take everything he can from this limited opportunity for any more information.
And yet.]
...How extensive is the damage, then?
no subject
Not the kind of thought he wants to entertain for long. But it stays all the same.
Jade's third question is -- unexpected. So much so that his head swivels to fix back on him directly, shaken completely from his distraction. No more logistics? No wondering about what it might mean for them, on the timeline or otherwise?]
It...
[("It's fine," Valkryie sneers, "Go on, it's what you always say.")]
...depends on what you mean by damage.
no subject
You received eleven months of memory and a swap of your skull in the span of an instant, Skulduggery. This is not a normal thing that any one person could possibly be used to experiencing.
[To say nothing of just what might have transpired, for him, over the course of those eleven months either...Jade certainly couldn't begin to guess. But even if they were the most mundane eleven months anyone could possibly have, the fact still remains that getting so many memories rather abruptly jammed into one's head in the passing of a blink...might, perhaps, be just a tad overwhelming.
You know, if he had to take a guess.]
Or would you rather I'd have wasted my last question with something more standard and useless, like "Are you alright"? As if we don't both know the answer to that already. [Clear enough that the damage is there, after all. Considering...] You didn't seem particularly certain as to whether even four weeks of vacation would be enough...or am I wrong?
no subject
[But it's supposed to be normal for him. He's experienced memory recall before through his reflection, the pieces of information slotting neatly into the timeline of his day, as if he'd lived both lives simultaneously with very little dissonance.
These memories, however -- they are jammed into place. Crudely so in comparison to what he's used to. The two spans of time don't align at all and thinking about those eleven months feels like unspooling a gnarled tangle of thread. He can't trace his standing here back to the moment he'd been walking before, much less to the abruptly-filled gap of a year.]
It... is jarring. Abrupt. I should be able to -- but they don't fit the way they need to. Sloppy paperwork, really. If it weren't for the skull, this would all be some awful trick. I could play along, maybe... But no. I should be used to this. We have memory spells, I've used my reflection for reconnaissance, but this is... different.
[Jammed in and worst of all, he can remember every feeling, every moment, as clearly as if he really had been living it. Reflections don't have emotions to transfer, and he's never used it for longer than a few days. This -- this...]
...I think it's... too much? [Unsure, even as he says it,] I think, if it had been different, maybe not. But as it stands -- yes. It's too much. So I need a vacation. I need a break. I need to not think about it...
[As if he could possibly put it aside for any length of time...]
no subject
Well, no, Jade's pretty sure he could still hardly begin to relate to what Skulduggery's feeling about now. ...Honestly, he's actually a little surprised at the honesty that does seem to come forth on Skulduggery's part at length after all--because he really had been half-expecting a brushing-off of the "I'm fine" variety, even if it had been a risk he'd been willing to take in using his third question like he has. The cold and practical part of him--the part that really would like to get back to logistics and theories, to assessing what all this might indeed mean for all of them--yes, that part does still vaguely feel that it was a waste. ...But it's not the only part that governs Jade's thoughts anymore, either. No, if anything, there's another part that does take some validation from what Skulduggery admits to eventually--even if it's a halting and uncertain sort of admission, that only rather cements what Jade has been suspecting ever since he first read through that manic text message of earlier.
The fact that Skulduggery's saying it, though...perhaps that means something. Maybe. He's not...sure what, but--]
'Too much' is probably putting it rather lightly, quite frankly. ...It is possibly something of a feat that you're even out and about like this, right now. But if it's a break, that you think will improve things...
[Jade doesn't think a "break" is going to help, really--not in the conventional sense of the word, anyway. Not when he's pretty positive Skulduggery's finding it all but physically impossible to actually not think about this for any amount of time. Because Jade knows he certainly would be, if it were him...and he's had yet to find a single thing that truly makes the thoughts just stop for awhile, not really. But.]
Well, I imagine I've probably been quite the opposite of any help, where that might be concerned. ...And my question limit is up anyhow, it would seem. [It's a hollow sort of humor, well aware of how little such platitudes really matter in this particular instance; but Jade's head and posture dips in a brief and professional sort of partial bow anyhow, before he straightens to attention once more.] I am a man of my word most times; so, I shall leave you in peace now, insomuch as it might help. Though if there's any other way I could help...
[...Hmm, well. That last bit actually comes out before he quite realizes, but in the end Jade lets it trail off too, with a shrug of his shoulders.]
Ah, but you would have already told me anyhow if there were, I'm sure! [And all Skulduggery has told him up to this point is Go Away, essentially; no terribly difficult dots to connect, there, you know?] I do hope your vacation offers at least a little of what you're seeking. I'll be quite curious to know if it works.
[As if they both don't already know that it won't. ...But with that, Jade's going to take his leave back in the direction of the library without further pretense, assuming he can move past Skulduggery unimpeded from there. May as well get the rest of those books at the checkout desk sorted, after all...]