come_sailaway | [open & closed] my life is changing every day

Entry tags:

[open & closed] my life is changing every day

Who: Skulduggery Pleasant, plus whoever wants to deal with Skulduggery Pleasant
What: Epilogue with Fio, post-Labyrinth check-ins, and a light karaoke prompt.
When: All of May
Where: Windjammer, Chatterbox, ~around~
Warnings: None off the top, will update if needed.
Notes: There's a difference between the check-in prompt for close cr vs everyone else; if you're unsure where you fall, feel free to ask me!

[windjammer (closed to Fio)] i know i've felt like this before
[things are resolved sooner or later. well, "resolved" is a bit of a bold claim, given that Sparkles disappeared into the shadows before anyone could stop it, but at least the lights are on and their reality is still intact.

he has a lot to do, probably. but right now, his only immediate concern is getting Fio off the roof and making sure she's alright. the Captain can -- well, honestly he probably disappears the same way Sparkles does, knowing that Skulduggery will be following him before long. it's fine, they both need a minute to compose themselves.

Skulduggery goes to Fio's side, crouching down so that he can easily wrap his arms tight around her.] Fio. I was so worried about you.

[the bridge (closed to the Captain)] you have my heart (so don't hurt me)
[...and then there's later, after the mob has dispersed to obtain creature comforts beyond tea and tiny sandwiches. Skulduggery checks in over text with his immediate family, but the only place his feet will lead him is the bridge. he's spent too long in close quarters with humans, and after everything that just happened, he has no interest in spending more time with the majority of them.

there will be time to see what comes from Sparkles being freed, later. for now, he allows himself to relish in the feeling of being well and truly home again. a win like this, tenuous as it may be, must be appreciated while it's fresh. in hindsight, it might not feel much like success at all.

by the time he enters the bridge itself, he's taken off his hat and jacket, the latter folded neatly over his arm until he can hang it up on the coatrack he knows will be waiting for him inside.]

[around the ship (close cr)] my dreams are never quite as it seems
[the time comes a few days later, as Skulduggery wanders the ship, touring the changes to the bars, guessing at what else they might have affected by smashing so many tubes in the crew quarters. when he sees the familiar faces of the people who may as well be family to him, he makes a point to circle back to them, innocuously appearing beside them as they walk, or at the chair across from them at a table. his head tilts in a way they can most certainly read as concerned, especially with the soft, questioning lilt to his voice.]

How are you holding up?

[around the ship] impossible to ignore
[and then, there are the people he doesn't feel comfortable approaching. the brief acquaintances, the uneasy truces, and those who may have said things during the confrontation with Sparkles that he won't forget -- these people, he simply nods a greeting towards. he doesn't know where he stands with just about everyone on the ship at this point, and frankly, he isn't interested in walking head-first into a fight with ~~Rita~~ ~~Vance~~ people in general.

if they have something to say to him, however, he will slow to match their pace, or otherwise gesture for them to take an empty seat near him.]

[chatterbox] you're dream to me
[he has missed the Chatterbox. he'd almost broken out into song several times in the waiting room, trying to stave off the boredom that threatened to eat him alive; now that he has the improv club back, though, nobody's safe.

as usual, his stage-hogging self waits until it's late at night to abuse the machine, although they seem to have reached an accord. (or maybe the ghosts that manned it are gone, now. who knows!) of course, if somebody comes in, he'll gladly hand the mic over -- just, you know. in a song or two.]

[wildcard]
(Throw something up at random, or throw me a line on Discord to plan something!)

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[Natsuno is sprawled in a pool chair like he's soaking up the fake sun. A hint of heavy metal can be heard from his headphones and his eyes are shut, but they snap open when Skulduggery passes by.]

Your boyfriend's still a fucking coward.

[His tone is fairly neutral, missing the usual disdain reserved for the captain. Natsuno's opinion about the skeleton is mostly unchanged, but right now everything feels... faded. And Skulduggery did save him from the maze.]

Hm. That he very well may be. [but no more a coward than Skulduggery himself.] I will, however, take cowardice over recklessness, at least where he's concerned. The former is usually less likely to get us killed than the latter.

[there's an argument to be made that this entire reality exists due to the Captain's carelessness, after all. his desire for instant gratification, to find a quick fix for death, has led all of them here.]

...You were right, you know.

[He raises an eyebrow and pushes the headphones back.]

That's new. About what?

[...he can guess, but he wants to hear him say it. Even Natsuno Yuuki isn't immune to stupid teen pride.]

The Captain is the only one who can do anything about Sparkles. [he tilts his head.] I don't agree with pretty much anything else that was said the other day, but I do agree with that.

Hm.

[That tracks. Natsuno can't even be bothered to get mad, because he didn't expect Skulduggery to agree with anything else.]

But he didn't. Fio and Tayrey did. So what now? Coddle him until he deigns to stop messing around and face himself?

I know it may not seem like it, but sometimes doing nothing is doing something. Holding your move until you know more about what you're facing is acceptable. And in this particular case, we're butting up against something none of us are very familiar with.

[a beat.]

Neither the Captain nor Sparkles can be killed without destroying the reality we all rely on to live. If killing it is out of the question, that leaves two options. The Captain can either attempt to reunite the disparate parts of his soul, or he can choose to let that part of him lick its wounds in peace.

If he reunited with Sparkles, there's no guarantee that we would wind up with the better of the two halves -- it's just as likely that what progress the Captain has made would be overwhelmed by the memory of pain and torment that Sparkles represents. By giving it the space he has, we give the part of him that hurt enough to start all of this a chance to come around to our way of thinking.

[Natsuno frowns but ultimately gives a single nod. The "our way of thinking" bullshit aside, these are their current options, since killing them is sadly off the table and Sparkles isn't going back in the engine.

Still, it's not nearly good enough.]

And how long should we keep "holding our move?" Before the resort, I asked you what happens if we end up in the void before the captain has that magical change of heart you keep insisting is possible. Well, now we've got TWO parts of him around, and maintenance has gone done.

Hm.... [it mostly depends on if they can survive whatever the Captain needs to do to keep them afloat. but they're also relying on the Captain to eventually do something, while he's become too complacent as a backseat driver...]

First of all, maintenance has gone down because we're not relying on the Captain for a majority of our fuel. This entire reality was built on his childhood suffering. And, as far as I can tell, a majority of the changes have come about from peoples' wanton destruction of the crew quarters. Some of that was unavoidable, obviously. The rest of it... Well. It doesn't matter. What's done is done.

[no point in placing blame anywhere... out loud, anyway.]

The fact is, the move was held. That doesn't mean everything has completely ground to a standstill. We're simply in uncharted waters; it'll take time to sort out the mess. We've freed a majority of the ghosts, which is what many people wanted. Now, we move on to the next pressing issue: keeping the lights on. Once we know we've got more than a month to live, we can divert focus back to securing our own freedom next.

[The frowns deepens. He figured the changes in maintenance and supply may cause problems in the long run, but hadn't considered that they might not have a long run. Natsuno sits up a little straighter, resurfacing through the dissociative funk despite himself. Ugh, he HATES it when Skulduggery is talking sense!]

Everyone feels like shit now, isn't that enough? [...] Keeping the lights on means more excursions.

[nobody likes it when Skulduggery's right, mostly because he can be such an insufferable dick about it!]

If only our general malaise were enough. [he sighs at the mention of excursions, as if they could all be considered equal. ...he'd been hoping not to bring it up until people had a moment to rest, but Natsuno isn't the sort of kid to let him side-step an issue of such magnitude.] ...It means more excursions that end poorly, yes. We are running on half, maybe a quarter, of the power that the ship is used to. And eventually, we're going to need to refuel eventually.

[More excursions that end poorly. Back to the bad old days, only instead of trying to unify against the cause of these horrors, all Natsuno can see is more arguments about whose fault it is.

He should be furious right now, but he's so damn tired.]

And refueling has to be by suffering? [He failed to get a straight answer from the captain, but Skulduggey used to be so optimistic about things changing.] Why can't he do something nice and keep the lights on with positive feelings?

[the various reactions and arguments that Natsuno is imagining have been floating around his skull rent free since they got back, and despite his best attempts, he can't hide the brief laugh that escapes him at the question. it's a tired sound, a mix of exasperation and wishful thinking.]

Do you really think people would go for that? Half of them would refuse out of principle, the other half would be too anxious about being happy enough to actually generate any real momentum. That's not including the others who would pry the horse's lips back to get a good look at its teeth...

[he shakes his head.]

I kept trying. The diner, the island, the resort, the fair... It didn't work. They fought, argued, begged their questions... and now we're all going to suffer for it.

[Yeah, that's wishful thinking, isn't it? And the arguments are already being drafted, because while they can both agree people wouldn't trust nice excursions enough to generate meaningful momentum, they don't agree on who's responsible.

A dozen scathing retorts come to Natsuno's mind, regurgitating the same anger and frustration and circular arguments, tallying old scores. He doesn't say any of them. What's the point? Suffering is coming anyway and running his mouth will only make things worse.]

It works both ways, you know. Lashing out and mistrusting because you've been hurt too much. Eventually it'll be up to him to keep trying to take our joy instead of our pain.

You aren't wrong -- and that's exactly why I would encourage people to speak with him. He needed to see for himself that the majority of people aren't so cruel as the ones he was tormented by.

[he thinks it worked. just... not enough. never enough.]

I know you think I don't hold the Captain responsible for what we go through, but that isn't true. I know as well as you do that this is all his doing. But it isn't just him who deserves the blame. It also belongs with the passengers before us, who played the game the way it was meant to be played. And it's just as much our fault, for not being able to come together when it's needed most. That's the trouble with fear and anger. They're much easier to sow and reap than love and happiness.

...hm. Well, what's done is done, right? Now it's the easy way if we want to keep existing.

[Natsuno leans back in the chair. The frown smooths into his usually stoic expression.]

Guess there's nothing else to do but pass the time until it happens.

[He's too tired to worry or be upset right now. Let the martyrs go on excursions - he's done.]

It used to be the easy way. Now it's the only way.

[at least until they figure out something better, or find another power source. now, if only he knew how to achieve either of those things...]

You're right. Nothing can be done at the moment. But we'll figure it out. We win one battle, we lose another -- but the war isn't over until we've freed ourselves from the ship, or the ship consumes us all. That's all we can do. That, and ensure that only people prepared to deal with the consequences sign up for whatever the Captain conjures next.

[Natsuno was ready to leave voluntary sign-ups as a vengeful thought, maybe something to discuss with his friends in private, and he's a little surprised Skulduggery brought it up.

Man, he can't believe he actually keeps agreeing here.]

...the captain should be the one to tell everyone. Explain the situation honestly, without deflecting or telling shitty jokes.

[that's the thing about being on opposing sides: it usually means there's the occasional middle ground to land on.]

They certainly won't like hearing how it's at least partially our fault that things are going this way. They might just as well decide he's lying to save themselves the guilt.

[that isn't a disagreement by any means.]

That's on them. Doesn't change the fact it's the captain's responsibility to explain.

[the lack of immediate comment is the only real indication that Skulduggery is pulling a face at the thought of convincing the Captain to take responsibility. still...]

You aren't wrong.

[Skulduggery agrees with him twice in a single conversation? Things ARE rather dire...]

No, I'm right.

[There's a difference!!]

[his head tilts ever-so-slightly up, which is Skulduggery speak for 🙄]

If the semantics are that important to you, sure.

[He shrugs.] Take what you can get, right?

[Being a brat isn't as satisfying as he'd like, though. Not when they're waiting for torture and mayhem...

He pushes the headphones back up.]

Anyway, I'm on vacation until the torture starts again.

[And when it does, he will no longer argue. All he can do is look after his own.]

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[open & closed] my life is changing every day

impossible to ignore

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