Wayne (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ablativeholopleather) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
come_sailaway2023-05-12 02:22 pm
ablativeholopleather) wrote in come_sailaway2023-05-12 02:22 pm
[Semi-Open] DYWTYLM
Who: Wayne and CR
What: Trying to cope with the changes around here
When: Any time after leaving The Tube Room
Where: Throughout the ship
Warnings: Depression and existential ennui
Do you duck into deep blue safety? (All CR)
Wayne practically lives up on Deck Six, where he can get a decent amount of sun, soak in the hot tubs, or go and hide out down in the bottom of the pool when it doesn't seem as if anyone would notice or worry about him with everything else that's been happening in the aftermath. He keeps to where he can have an eye out on others coming and going when he's not down underwater. Which he is fairly often, likely to the chagrin of a few that know that he does this sometimes, regardless of whether or not they know he doesn't actually need to breathe. Nowadays at least he's got a relatively simple lifeline: A water-tight bag for his phone. It's not a perfect or permanent solution, but it's better than not having it at all. It means if someone wants to get ahold of him when he's down there, they can.
Someone may also simply spot him down there as they walk by, or do laps. His yellow kind of sticks out against the blue of the pool bottom.
Do you know what it is? (Close CR)
Wayne spends more time away from the rest of the ship now than he had in the months since his arrival. Call it depression, call it self-isolation, either way, the result is the same. He doesn't leave Cabin 144 for days at a time. At least he's clean, if a little bit cluttered, his bed remaining unmade most of the time and his cat figures still sitting on every available surface. There are even a couple of new ones, by now enough that he thinks perhaps he should label them.
For now, he simply exists on his own, sometimes plucking idle tunes without the need for an amplifier, other times simply dissociating in the familiar dimness of the cabin. He won't ignore anyone that comes to check in, but they may notice the light compression patches on his skin where he's leaned his head against the side of the couch or a wall for long periods.
Are you trying to live? (Wildcard)
Wayne looks lost, more often than not these days. He's been given a lot to think about recently, and all of it comes back to the sheer, crushing weight of the anxiety. It may have shifted in form, but it is very much something that he now lives with on a more present level. And now, other people know that it's a problem. Which in and of itself is a problem.
No matter where he ends up, be it the Lounge where he'll generally be curled up with a book from the library, or staring out of a window with the most dead-eyed expression, or at Sand Dollars or Stellar in the morning, Windjammer or Mikabo in the evening, or just up wherever there's a rail that he can sit beside, arms crossed atop it and eyes out on the not-so-infinite water.
It's getting harder to be (myself) (Closed, for Gil)
They needed to talk about things. He knows that. It's hard to think when he's not around the man, and he knows it's because of the attachment that he's long since given up on the idea of it being friendly or platonic. He's nervous, oh yes, but he also realizes that he can't just say that Gil is humoring him or playing along and letting him down as slowly and gently as possible. But he needs to know where they stand in the days following the head chamber, and the hourglass chamber that they'd awoken in. He needs to see him.
can I visit?
A message sent off late in the evening, when most everyone else seemed to be about to turn in. Nevermind that he's leaning against the wall opposite Gil's cabin door, wavering back and forth on whether to just invite himself in. In the end, he opts simply to wait.
I cannot hope to give you what I cannot give myself (Closed, for Crichton)
He'd promised to fix Crichton's shattered nose as soon as he had the material for it. Unfortunately, this had taken a few days thanks to the broken new system of restocking. Maybe not long at all in the grand scheme, but at least a couple of days longer than would have been preferable. But in the end, he's found what he needed: a cupcake, with pink frosting and plain white paper. He's already headed toward where he'd last spotted his friend, and doesn't actually think to take out his phone to warn the man that he's on his way. After all, he's got a cupcake! This is phenomenal news that needs to be delivered in person!
"Commander! Guess what!"
Smile back...at me...oh please... (Closed, for Helena)
He needed to sleep so badly, he had ended up passing out in his cabin before he could actually touch base with Helena again. He'd spent so long out of commission that it wasn't for another couple of days that he messaged her, already feeling guilty over the idea that he'd managed to worry her yet again.
remember when i was talking abt the cats in my cabin
and you talked about a larva
He's looking up at the pretty frosted crystal cat that represents her, now with her name written on its underside in marker.
What: Trying to cope with the changes around here
When: Any time after leaving The Tube Room
Where: Throughout the ship
Warnings: Depression and existential ennui
Do you duck into deep blue safety? (All CR)
Wayne practically lives up on Deck Six, where he can get a decent amount of sun, soak in the hot tubs, or go and hide out down in the bottom of the pool when it doesn't seem as if anyone would notice or worry about him with everything else that's been happening in the aftermath. He keeps to where he can have an eye out on others coming and going when he's not down underwater. Which he is fairly often, likely to the chagrin of a few that know that he does this sometimes, regardless of whether or not they know he doesn't actually need to breathe. Nowadays at least he's got a relatively simple lifeline: A water-tight bag for his phone. It's not a perfect or permanent solution, but it's better than not having it at all. It means if someone wants to get ahold of him when he's down there, they can.
Someone may also simply spot him down there as they walk by, or do laps. His yellow kind of sticks out against the blue of the pool bottom.
Do you know what it is? (Close CR)
Wayne spends more time away from the rest of the ship now than he had in the months since his arrival. Call it depression, call it self-isolation, either way, the result is the same. He doesn't leave Cabin 144 for days at a time. At least he's clean, if a little bit cluttered, his bed remaining unmade most of the time and his cat figures still sitting on every available surface. There are even a couple of new ones, by now enough that he thinks perhaps he should label them.
For now, he simply exists on his own, sometimes plucking idle tunes without the need for an amplifier, other times simply dissociating in the familiar dimness of the cabin. He won't ignore anyone that comes to check in, but they may notice the light compression patches on his skin where he's leaned his head against the side of the couch or a wall for long periods.
Are you trying to live? (Wildcard)
Wayne looks lost, more often than not these days. He's been given a lot to think about recently, and all of it comes back to the sheer, crushing weight of the anxiety. It may have shifted in form, but it is very much something that he now lives with on a more present level. And now, other people know that it's a problem. Which in and of itself is a problem.
No matter where he ends up, be it the Lounge where he'll generally be curled up with a book from the library, or staring out of a window with the most dead-eyed expression, or at Sand Dollars or Stellar in the morning, Windjammer or Mikabo in the evening, or just up wherever there's a rail that he can sit beside, arms crossed atop it and eyes out on the not-so-infinite water.
It's getting harder to be (myself) (Closed, for Gil)
They needed to talk about things. He knows that. It's hard to think when he's not around the man, and he knows it's because of the attachment that he's long since given up on the idea of it being friendly or platonic. He's nervous, oh yes, but he also realizes that he can't just say that Gil is humoring him or playing along and letting him down as slowly and gently as possible. But he needs to know where they stand in the days following the head chamber, and the hourglass chamber that they'd awoken in. He needs to see him.
can I visit?
A message sent off late in the evening, when most everyone else seemed to be about to turn in. Nevermind that he's leaning against the wall opposite Gil's cabin door, wavering back and forth on whether to just invite himself in. In the end, he opts simply to wait.
I cannot hope to give you what I cannot give myself (Closed, for Crichton)
He'd promised to fix Crichton's shattered nose as soon as he had the material for it. Unfortunately, this had taken a few days thanks to the broken new system of restocking. Maybe not long at all in the grand scheme, but at least a couple of days longer than would have been preferable. But in the end, he's found what he needed: a cupcake, with pink frosting and plain white paper. He's already headed toward where he'd last spotted his friend, and doesn't actually think to take out his phone to warn the man that he's on his way. After all, he's got a cupcake! This is phenomenal news that needs to be delivered in person!
"Commander! Guess what!"
Smile back...at me...oh please... (Closed, for Helena)
He needed to sleep so badly, he had ended up passing out in his cabin before he could actually touch base with Helena again. He'd spent so long out of commission that it wasn't for another couple of days that he messaged her, already feeling guilty over the idea that he'd managed to worry her yet again.
remember when i was talking abt the cats in my cabin
and you talked about a larva
He's looking up at the pretty frosted crystal cat that represents her, now with her name written on its underside in marker.
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He can't speak like this, but he can blow a small stream of bubbles in response to her investigating.
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Is he, in fact, some sort of amphibian? Is he a salamander?
Ylva circles him, then catches at his arm with her webbed paws.
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Comprehensible words are hard under the water, but at least he seems okay? And not drowned?
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Words later.
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River otters can hold their breath for about eight minutes, but unlike Wayne, they do still need to breathe. Eventually, that timer does run out. Ylva nudges him in a friendly way and then wriggles away to swim up to the surface. She climbs onto the edge of the pool, shifting shape so that she can sit there, damp, with her bare feet dangling in the water.
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"Hi," he finally greets, offering a small smile. He doesn't seem inclined to question the fact that it was her that was just hanging out with him down there.
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She pulls her hair over her shoulder, and starts wringing it out. Casually, as you do. "I thought -- I wasn't sure what I thought, seeing you on the bottom like that. I was kind of worried, you know."
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He offers what he hopes is a comforting smile. He's run into that a few times by now, that worry over seeing him down there, even from people that know he doesn't necessarily need to actively be breathing. "I can't, but I also don't actually need to breathe unless I'm talking to people. Sorry for scaring you. I like your little weasel shape though, that's cute."
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She's not really judgemental, but sort of faintly amazed. That doesn't track with anything she knows about how anything works, but she can't exactly disbelieve him, given the evidence.
"It's called an otter. They're a lot like weasels, though, but better swimmers."
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Sorry Ylva, there's a lot about him that doesn't defy what most people understand about how biology works.
"Otter," he repeats. New creature knowledge acquired! "I got messed up by a bunch of weasels back before all this but they were also all about as big as me at the time."
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Ylva considers this, though. "Sounds a bit like a dire weasel. I've seen them. Most weasels, though, tiny. And ferocious. I love them." She does, in fact, have a deep love for all things ferocious.
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"Maybe if you hang out down there with me they won't worry as much," he suggests. "If they think someone's keeping an eye on me, you know?"
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Ylva kicks her feet through the water, idly. "Why do you want to sit on the bottom of the pool? I mean, I'm not judging. I'm just sort of curious."
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"It's quiet," he eventually replies. "After...what's happened to us these last months, I feel a lot safer down there." He can't hurt anyone, and he's not in a position to be hurt, himself. And unlike his cabin, people can't just sit down there with him until he concedes and comes out again.
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"Yeah," she says, "I get it. I usually opt to be something... not human for a while. Wolf, usually. People let you be, or at least they... act differently. And it's easier for a while."
She rubs her hand across her face.
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"I think it has been getting better, mostly," she says. "There was a zombie attack a bit after I first got here. Like, people died. It was pretty bad. And bad stuff has happened since then but not... not in the same way. What just happened with the labyrinth... it was really bad. But it was also one of the worst things that's happened in ages. And zombies taste terrible, I don't know if you know that, but I hate fighting them."
She kicks her legs again. "I can turn you into something for a little bit, if you wanted. I mean, you might have to actually breathe to live if I did that, that's probably a thing you should be prepared for, but I could."
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Wayne watches the way the water ripples, arms crossing atop his knees. "Turn me into something? Like what?" It's not as if he knows many animals at all that she might recognize, beyond cats or dogs, or one specific kind of bear.
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Ylva shrugs, vaguely.
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