come_sailaway

About midway through June, posters begin going up around the ship. They’re crude, clearly Friday-made creations, with cute little drawings and bubble letters. They all say basically the same thing:

When you arrive at the dining room at the appointed time, there is an arch of blue and white balloons in front of the door. As you pass through, you’re immediately greeted by the familiar icepick headache that always follows sojourns into other dimensions. The reason is immediately obvious: instead of the expected dining room, you are very much in what appears to be a school gym. A sizable one, with a DJ booth and a small stage, but you can still see the basketball hoops, for all that they’re covered in balloons. A lot of balloons. An honestly inadvisable amount of balloons.

There is a large dance floor in the middle of the room, under a spinning disco ball. Round tables of about four or five folding chairs each surround it; behind them, one can find the punch bowl, and a small buffet table of mostly finger foods (also a chocolate fountain, natch). the DJ booth isn’t manned, but it could be; it’ll play anyway, mostly 80s songs.

There are two gaudy thrones on the stage: one has a crown, the other a tiara, as well as sashes proclaiming the wearers to be prom king and queen. Behind the stage, a string is attached to the bucket of pig’s blood directly above the thrones, if you decide to be the funniest person to ever live.

There is a microphone stand on the stage. It doesn’t seem to be on.