Got a little soul

[decohere]

Who: Ava & co
What: Excursion recovery, pre-wedding excitement, some octofun
When: Waking up after the excursion, through mid-August
Warnings: ;( Excursion related trauma, mentions of autocannibalism and difficulties eating

i. Want a little warmth
(room 114, closed to 6, morning revival)

Ava's died before. 

That doesn't make waking from it any easier. With a stir and a whimper at the flood of memory threatening to drag her back under, Ava reaches out frantically to find 6. Confirm he's there. Warm, breathing, alive oh thank god he's alive. It's over and they both made it through. And then she curls up against him, trembling, to cry.

ii. But who's going to save a little warmth for me?
(texts, open to cr)

She doesn't leave her room that day, or the next. It doesn't feel safe. She doesn't feel ready to face the barrage of everyone else's feelings as she processes her own. 

But she sends out a few texts to her friends. Both those that went, and didn't. Checking in with a simple message:

ok?

iii. We know the fire awaits unbelievers
(room 114/hallway, open)

She peeks out the door a few times. Down the hallway. Considering, trying to work up enough motivation. But she still can't bring herself to step out.

"Where... are you going?" Ava asks quietly, to somebody passing by. She fades more under the returned gaze.

iv. All of the sinners the same
(scoops, open)

She's since heard that the whole unfortunate event was televised. Of course it was. Generate more misery, more fuel.

She hates it all the same. But it's finally what gets her out, a determination to prove that yes she's fine to all those that probably take satisfaction in the idea that she's not. That it doesn't matter who all has witnessed her gruesome demise, who thinks she deserved exactly what she signed up for. She's fine, and she puts on what she thinks is a brave face to display in public. It's more of an anxious wince at every sound and sudden movement.

She hasn't eaten much over the last week, and when everything else still sounds incredibly unappetizing, Ava finally settles on ice cream. Piles up a whole sundae with banana and fudge, sprinkles and cherries, nuts and marshmallows... topped with a swirl of whipped cream.

And sits out on the promenade, so everyone walking by can see just how fine she is.

v. Girl, you and I will die unbelievers
(public restroom, open, cw puking and mentions of autocannibalism)

Maybe she ate too much ice cream. Maybe her body is still rebelling against food at all. But Ava finds herself locked in a stall and hunched over a toilet after nearly every attempted meal that week. The memory of tearing into and consuming her own limbs brings about another wave of nausea.

She sits on the cold floor for awhile, crying in frustration.

vi. Bound to the tracks of the train
(open)

"I don't want your sympathy," Ava finally snaps after a rough night of no sleep. Either mid-conversation, or to somebody that might be staring at her in any sort of way for too long.

She does, though. 

vii. I'm not excited, but should I be?
(open)

July finally fades away, and the transition into August has Ava far more optimistic with her upcoming wedding. The formally written invitations (6's work) have gone up, and seeing them around leaves her giddy with anticipation. "Will you attend?" she asks anyone she catches glancing at one.

During the week leading up to the event, she also checks in with her various friends that are helping out with the plans and arrangements, to make sure everything is good to go, that she hasn't forgotten any important details. 

viii. Is this the fate that half of the world has planned for me?
(library, cafe, open)

She can be found hanging around in the library and cafe again, mostly keeping herself busy with her puzzle books or a certain comic she received awhile back. She's not outright approaching anyone else, but her demeanor is far more welcoming toward anyone seeking her company.

ix. I know I love you, and you love the sea
(pool, ocean, open)

And finally she gets comfortable existing in her octopus form again, floating lazily around in the pool in the evenings. Trying to convince people to screw her into a glass jar so she can practice her escape techniques. Finding smaller and smaller crevices to squeeze herself through just to prove she can.

Or plunging overboard from the side of the ship, to explore the water now that it's much safer to do so. Maybe she should feel afraid, but the depths are calm and quiet and a nice retreat for awhile.

x. But what holy water contains a little drop, little drop for me
(wildcard. anything post-event to pre-wedding!)