Got a little soul

[decohere]

Who: Ava & co
What: Excursion recovery, pre-wedding excitement, some octofun
When: Waking up after the excursion, through mid-August
Warnings: ;( Excursion related trauma, mentions of autocannibalism and difficulties eating

i. Want a little warmth
(room 114, closed to 6, morning revival)

Ava's died before. 

That doesn't make waking from it any easier. With a stir and a whimper at the flood of memory threatening to drag her back under, Ava reaches out frantically to find 6. Confirm he's there. Warm, breathing, alive oh thank god he's alive. It's over and they both made it through. And then she curls up against him, trembling, to cry.

ii. But who's going to save a little warmth for me?
(texts, open to cr)

She doesn't leave her room that day, or the next. It doesn't feel safe. She doesn't feel ready to face the barrage of everyone else's feelings as she processes her own. 

But she sends out a few texts to her friends. Both those that went, and didn't. Checking in with a simple message:

ok?

iii. We know the fire awaits unbelievers
(room 114/hallway, open)

She peeks out the door a few times. Down the hallway. Considering, trying to work up enough motivation. But she still can't bring herself to step out.

"Where... are you going?" Ava asks quietly, to somebody passing by. She fades more under the returned gaze.

iv. All of the sinners the same
(scoops, open)

She's since heard that the whole unfortunate event was televised. Of course it was. Generate more misery, more fuel.

She hates it all the same. But it's finally what gets her out, a determination to prove that yes she's fine to all those that probably take satisfaction in the idea that she's not. That it doesn't matter who all has witnessed her gruesome demise, who thinks she deserved exactly what she signed up for. She's fine, and she puts on what she thinks is a brave face to display in public. It's more of an anxious wince at every sound and sudden movement.

She hasn't eaten much over the last week, and when everything else still sounds incredibly unappetizing, Ava finally settles on ice cream. Piles up a whole sundae with banana and fudge, sprinkles and cherries, nuts and marshmallows... topped with a swirl of whipped cream.

And sits out on the promenade, so everyone walking by can see just how fine she is.

v. Girl, you and I will die unbelievers
(public restroom, open, cw puking and mentions of autocannibalism)

Maybe she ate too much ice cream. Maybe her body is still rebelling against food at all. But Ava finds herself locked in a stall and hunched over a toilet after nearly every attempted meal that week. The memory of tearing into and consuming her own limbs brings about another wave of nausea.

She sits on the cold floor for awhile, crying in frustration.

vi. Bound to the tracks of the train
(open)

"I don't want your sympathy," Ava finally snaps after a rough night of no sleep. Either mid-conversation, or to somebody that might be staring at her in any sort of way for too long.

She does, though. 

vii. I'm not excited, but should I be?
(open)

July finally fades away, and the transition into August has Ava far more optimistic with her upcoming wedding. The formally written invitations (6's work) have gone up, and seeing them around leaves her giddy with anticipation. "Will you attend?" she asks anyone she catches glancing at one.

During the week leading up to the event, she also checks in with her various friends that are helping out with the plans and arrangements, to make sure everything is good to go, that she hasn't forgotten any important details. 

viii. Is this the fate that half of the world has planned for me?
(library, cafe, open)

She can be found hanging around in the library and cafe again, mostly keeping herself busy with her puzzle books or a certain comic she received awhile back. She's not outright approaching anyone else, but her demeanor is far more welcoming toward anyone seeking her company.

ix. I know I love you, and you love the sea
(pool, ocean, open)

And finally she gets comfortable existing in her octopus form again, floating lazily around in the pool in the evenings. Trying to convince people to screw her into a glass jar so she can practice her escape techniques. Finding smaller and smaller crevices to squeeze herself through just to prove she can.

Or plunging overboard from the side of the ship, to explore the water now that it's much safer to do so. Maybe she should feel afraid, but the depths are calm and quiet and a nice retreat for awhile.

x. But what holy water contains a little drop, little drop for me
(wildcard. anything post-event to pre-wedding!)

Comments

iii

[businessorlibation]

“Grabbing some tea for Watson. Is there anything you want from the Promenade?”

The look in Ava’s eyes is haunted, and the way she’s peeking out without crossing the threshold? That’s a sadly familiar state of affairs for Johnny. While he isn’t sure she’ll accept his care and concern, the fear of going outside is one he knows intimately.

“Or anywhere, really. I think he’ll understand if I take a little longer to return.”

[decohere]

Johnny seems a neutral enough individual to chance interaction with even in her vulnerable state. Not somebody who went, because he so rarely does venture out on excursions. And one with certain death on the line is the least appealing of all. But he is married to a man that volunteered, an ex-soldier with too much of a sense of duty not to. Watson that she regretfully parted ways with after the discovery of Friday's body, and has no idea what became of him. Johnny doesn't seem the sort that will use her displayed weakness against her, because he has somebody at home he's doing the same for.

Ava licks her dry lips. Tea wasn't what she was intending, but it does sound appealing. "I... was hoping for a book." Any, she can't formulate enough energy to decide on even a genre, wants to fill her head with thoughts that aren't her own instead for awhile. "But tea sounds nice...?"

ii

[redlightgreenlight]

Valdis has been waiting for people to wake up and reach out. She's been keeping an eye on Grace, but also paying attention to the general mood of the ship. Ava's text comes later in the day when Grace no longer requires her attention.

Are you?

Valdis didn't watch any of it, but she still heard bits and pieces.

[decohere]

She could give an empty answer, claim she's better than she is. But even if Valdis weren't an empath and would eventually see through the lie... Ava wants to be emotionally honest. She owes Valdis that much, when she knew the woman would have preferred her not to go at all.

alive. not quite well.

but it's over.

iii. Fire will ruin a good suit, you know

[freedomsuitsme]

He pauses, raising an eyebrow.

"Nowhere in particular," he responds, in a Transatlantic accent tinged with something more overtly English. "Pardon me, I don't believe we've been introduced."

He's a dapper-looking gentleman, even with one of his sleeves mis-matched from the rest of his suit. The pinstripes threaten to clash with the invading roses, but somehow, he makes it work. He's also an absolute beanpole, tall and scrawny and slightly more blue-gray than a human should generally be.

[decohere]

A year ago, Ava tried to keep better track of the comings and goings of passengers. But that habit's initial despair for the rapid replacement of those lost with strangers who needed to be broken in all over again has long since faded into an indifference.

If anyone's to last long around here, eventually they may cross paths, but she does her best to not to draw much attention to herself. Except for right now. Seems she isn't interrupting anything, at least.

She takes in his appearance with tired but analytical eyes, her body flickering in and out of focus from behind her still mostly closed door.

"No, I don't believe so," Ava agrees. Her own accent is a soft British, a complete betrayal of her entire backstory. She doesn't offer a name, not yet. "You're new." She isn't, her tone conveys.

v. Girl, you and I will die unbelievers

[teethoftherisk]

There's a thump as Siffleur paws a few times at the stall door, a knock of sorts. He sits outside the stall, giving her a chance to send him away if she doesn't want company. But there's nothing worse than throwing up alone and lying on a cold bathroom floor.

"Hello Ava." He says through the door. They texted after the event, and that's when he found out that her attempted death-date hadn't been a good experience. He'd been glad to see her sitting in public, and sad to see the moment it had turned badly for her. Now he's here to give her something only he can: a big kittycat to pet. "Let me in."

[decohere]

She's slow to react, physically and emotionally drained. But Ava does finally manage to reach up, unlocking the door with a soft click and allowing it to swing partially open before she goes back to leaning heavily against the stool.

"Hi," her throat burns. Her vision is blurred, but there's no mistaking Siffleur for anyone else. She reaches out to beckon him closer.

i

[be_seeing_you]

He takes her hand in his the moment he feels her reaching for it, and guides it to his chest. He's laying in bed on his back. Unfortunately, that's going to leave his wings in quite a state. He can deal with that later. Her trembling is his only concern. He tugs her closer until she can lay on his chest the way she used to.

"I'm here. Shh, it's all right. I'm right here."

[decohere]

His hushing is met with another whimper, kissed against his neck, his jaw, the side of his face that she's made damp with her tear-streaked cheek against his.

Her palm lays flat over his heartbeat he's guided her to, counting each beat out until her racing pulse finally manages to ease. She only just woke up and she's already exhausted.

Ava opens her mouth, and all words die. No combination of syllables can possibly convey how she feels. How sorry she is.

ix

[maximumcake]

"Hey, you're getting pretty good at that," Max says brightly from the side of the pool. He's there in nothing but his Speedo with a towel draped over his arm.

"Mind if I join you?"

[decohere]

She waves three limbs in greeting, which is fairly enthusiastic. "Been pretty empty lately," Ava says, acknowledging the collective water-related traumas.

Which she doesn't mind, she likes having the space to float her little canoe. But today she's up to something a bit different.

"Actually..." And instead of fully answering, she dives under to collect a jar from the bottom of the pool she's been fiddling with. Reappearing at the side, she sets it gently next to his feet and looks up expectantly.

ii

[saltwaterlungs]

Ava doesn't get a response straight away- unlike previous times, Darcy's got people to attend to them as soon as they wake up. But she does get one, when Darcy has a moment.

fine
better than i was expecting to be i think
you?

[decohere]

She can't allow herself to worry too much over any slow responses. They'll come when ready.

But she does smile with some relief at receiving Darcy's.

about as expected. it was fine up until it wasn't.

need anything?

The wildcard you deserve

[treadwater]

There is a knock on the door of Ava and 6's cabin. Somewhat hesitant, a little soft. You know, just.

Knock-knock.

[decohere]

Ava isn't expecting anyone by. But how things have been lately, visits for the sake of it have been more common. It doesn't arouse suspicion the way it used to, she doesn't barricade herself on the other side and demand who it is first.

Ava simply drifts over to the door and answers it.

Out of all the possible people to be standing on the other side, though... is a face she never thought she'd see again. One that she's never gotten over the ache of missing.

She stares, stunned. A hand to her mouth. "You're... it's... Undine, ohmygod, that's really you." She reaches out.

combo-ish iv/v?

[ablativeholopleather]

In the act of going and finding something to eat for himself while he's distracted by his own bullshit in the wake of the realization that everyone was coming back days earlier than any of them expected, Wayne has kept loose tabs on those that had returned. Brief breakfast with Helena, checking in on a few of his friends, and the intention to look in on Ava and Peter after having finally glanced at a screen that had lingered on the two of them dying together.

When she ends up in the bathroom, though, the instinct kicks into higher gear and he creeps inside with very little compunction about the whole, Men's room vs Women's room thing insert joke about the W standing for Wayne's room here. He approaches the stall in which she's seated herself, taking advantage of the lack of a need for oxygen and holding his breath to avoid the rancid smell, and knocks quietly.

"Hey," he murmurs, pulling a juice from his belongings and holding the little nondescript box where she might be able to grab it.

[decohere]

Usually somebody following would be on her radar, something she'd aim to flip around to catch her stalker in the act. So it's an indication of how terrible she's feeling that she startles at the familiar voice, hadn't been aware of the presence of another.

The single word can't convey a lot on its own, but it provides an identity. And the offered juice box from under the stall door says the rest.

Ava swallows against the acidic burn, and decides perhaps juice might be preferable to the lingering taste. A shaky transparent hand reaches out, fumbles with grasping.

"Hi, Wayne..." she responds weakly.

wildcard

[dupli_arms]

Shouji has spotted her here and there since they'd each woken up, fading in and out of view, obstinately trying to insist that she absolutely is enjoying herself, and that nothing at all is on her mind after what they'd been through on that alternate version of the ship. He knows what he should do, but every way he might try to approach her seems...inadequate. And he really doubts that she wants him to come anywhere near her, after the terse exchange before they'd each died in their own gruesome ways.

Still, it doesn't feel right to just leave things as they were. So Ava will find herself approached up on one of the upper decks, out in the sun, by a sheepish-looking Shouji dressed far more casually than the last time they'd encountered one another, albeit in a soft blue mask that hid everything that his hair didn't cover, an eye hovering level at his elbow and a mouth on the opposite side. As soon as he knows that he has her attention, he bows at the waist with his main hands clasped in front of him.

"I wished to apologize for my behavior, the last time we met," he starts quietly, keeping his head down. "What I said was inappropriate and hurtful, and you didn't deserve that regardless of the situation."

[decohere]

As the kid approaches, Ava braces herself for what she expects to be a confrontation. One that she'll allow rather than escape from, because she's aware enough that she deserves it.

The apology feels far harsher than any possible verbal attack. Because she can't simply tell him to fuck off. She has to take some responsibility now.

"You didn't hurt me. You were trying to find an opportunity to do the right thing in a dire situation, and I deliberately sought to subvert it."

iii

[busball]

Klaus is sitting outside in the hallway, kind of waiting for an excuse to bother Ava as if he really needs one, but it's fine. They've heard the door open a few times but always came out too late to see her before the door shut again, so now it's 'sit outside the door and play with your Tamagotchi hours.

"Waiting for you to open the door again," is the most honest answer they have and they look up at Ava quietly. "Move over, I'm coming in."

[decohere]

"Ah, you finally came to apologize," it's a weak attempt at a joke, trying to prove she's doing much better than she actually is. But she steps aside to allow Klaus in all the same, arms wrapped around her midsection.

vi

[millay]

Maeve hadn't seen what happened on the ship, had been crushed herself in the lifeboat. She'd say it was a surprise, but in the end, at least she was half expecting it.

Having seen Ava, she's planning to go over to her when she hears the snap and pauses, trying to hide the flicker of hurt at the words when she doesn't think she appeared terribly sympathetic so much as friendly. Though, she reasons, if they were both on the ship, perhaps something happened. "Ah. Of course, if you need time alone, I'll leave you to it. I just wanted to check in..."

[decohere]

She immediately feels bad, Maeve is one of the last people that deserves to be snapped at. And even though she hadn't seen her upon that day, Ava knew her name was amongst the list of volunteers. That she suffered the same fate.

"Sorry," she hangs her head, staring down at her hands. "I'm just. Tired. Of hearing the same words, right now."

ii

[goodweather]

Better than I thought I’d be.

Which is not a yes.

you?

[decohere]

first time?
here i mean

A frown as she considers.

my third and it still sucks.

ii

[lightconductor]

Am recovering. You? -JW

[decohere]

hiding in the dark until things calm, per tradition -as

ii

[sabigoe]

Some time after Skulduggery checks up on her, Fio will send her response:

Welcome back.

Accompanied by an image attachment of Lepus the stuffed bunny rabbit, holding a fabric flower sewn together by Fio herself. She doubts most people are feeling well after reviving. So, the photo's a reminder for Ava that there's things to look forward to... like the wedding.

[decohere]

thank you. sorry if it was a bit longer than expected.

But she's sure that Fio got along fine all the same. She's been growing more independent with age, and Ava has been allowing her more space to exercise it. Her worrying isn't needed.

is that a cute new friend of yours? the flowers are coming along so nicely.

ii.

[light_mischief]

There's so much he wants to say, itching already to dive into more mysteries, face new threats and avoid the complications that have arisen since he woke up a few hours ago. But, all of that is best served in a face-to-face conversation, and Skulduggery isn't sure either of them are quite up for that yet.

So, he starts with small talk.

As well as expected. You?

[decohere]

any job you want done right you do yourself yeah

good news?

vii

[astrogator]

[Ari is really admiring the calligraphy on those invitations. Sure, she could have run up something similar in a fraction of the time using her printer, but that's not really the point, is it? Real care went into those.

She turns to Ava.]

Yes. Yes, I think I'd like to.

[She'd had to pretend to be happy at Nobunaga and Klaus' wedding, and that had somehow turned into genuine enjoyment, happiness for their sake. That could happen again, couldn't it? Despite their differences, she likes both Ava and Peter.]

I've been helping Klaus with his speech.

[decohere]

Then you're certainly welcome. [genuinely. they've had their disagreements, but Ari's conduct during has proven her as somebody Ava can respect despite, the way she holds true to her beliefs. there's no lingering grudge nor resentment.

part of her wants to show Ari there is some good that can come from these circumstances, as difficult as it is to accept otherwise. that they all must keep moving forward, that life can still have meaning if they allow.

and she brightens up at the mention of her working with Klaus.] Not too nervous, I hope?

Closed to Skulduggery and Maximilien

[decohere]

[it has been awhile since the three of them had an arranged meeting, and so Ava takes the occasion quite seriously, dressed in her best (and only) suit, using Peter's help to make sure she's free of rumple.

she arrives early to scope out chatterbox for any unwelcome interlopers, and makes sure she's looking appropriately shifty while doing so. and then takes a seat, waiting for the arrival of her most esteemed coconspirators.

fingers steepled upon the table in a pose she's picked up from Maximilien.]

Gentlemen.

[makesomedeals]

[Maximilien made it a point to walk here as conspicuously as possible, briefcase in one hand, the handcuff still dangling from the handle. He genuinely hopes someone tries to interrupt them, even though he doesn't quite know the context of this meeting. ]

Good evening. I trust you weren't followed?

[Just standard spy stuff.]