come_sailaway | (no subject)

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Who: Venti and open /o/
What: laaate post-event thing for him, waking up from a little stress nap and being tiny.
When: near september!
Where: hurikane mostly!
Warnings: none really except maybe coming back from death and trauma-y memories if he talks about that. other than that he’s just a small fairy being an idiot.

[ it's not very responsible of him, but 1) responsibility and 2) venti: pick one. he is actually the kind of person who tends to disappear at occasional moments, sometimes at the most irresponsible times. he's also the kind who could stress-nap entire decades away, so maybe a good couple of days or even a week is being almost responsible for him. there's darkness, then he wakes up in bed rather unexpectedly and painfully by his new roomie. he processes that he's returned to life and rafaela is back and instead of talking to her or going out and checking on other people, why not just... go back to sleep. so he does.

a day later or so, he kind of disappears entirely, like wind invisible that may float away.

and maybe a week after that, the wind may slowly pull himself together. but he is weak, he's not terribly strong, he's rather tired and maybe lost more faith in himself. venti himself hasn't been around in a good while but a fairy-looking thing, something small and white that practically looks like a bird from a distance, would be slowly floating through the ship towards a bar. you can maybe find this creature:

1. fluttering rather dazedly, like a dizzy bee, charting a little path through the ship en route to deck five.
2. it seems to take breaks every so often to simply sit on the ground, or maybe even float to sit tiredly on your shoulder or head if you're nearby and make a nice perch.
3. sitting on the ground staring up at the door to hurikane, looking bemused at how to open it, chirping tiredly at you if you're nearby to please open the door!
4. if he manages to get in the bar, the critter is sitting on the counter making half-hearted little chirps to the ghost bartender who apparently doesn't get the hint that he needs wine.
5. eventually, or maybe a day later or so, venti would find it in himself to transform back and simply be found in hurikane at a table surrounded by bottles. he needs this, he really does.
(6. wildcard/anything else!! i might just make this a catch-all for september too i don't know yet) ]

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(if only he was big enough to receive a hug and she can't seem to come up with any words of comfort, either. so silently, she sets the lid aside with her things before letting her index brush along aside of his "cheek".

there's nothing much else she can do beyond that and it aches her to see him this way. so hurt over... the meaning behind this cloth. but given there is blood upon it and what she knows of venti as a whole, maybe it had something to do with his long lost friend that died. if her theory is correct, then someone needs to be throat punched for giving someone such a horrid gift. possibly friday. maybe she'll make her way to the service desk tomorrow and shoot her in the shoulder for good measure.

but for now, jinx will continue brush along him -- letting him know that she is here with him.)

[ no don’t shoot friday… is what he’d say if he has any idea of her thoughts, but he doesn’t. and he doesn’t actually feel like thinking about anything at all other than just lying here. maybe he could pass another week just sleeping here in this cloak just like this, when he doesn’t want to think of anything at all.

whether this is a good gift or not is entirely beyond him. after the war was over and his friend buried, he didn’t consider ever having a physical memento of him. so maybe in a way this is some kind of twisted blessing, he never would have imagined finding or having something of his, like this. he’ll just stay here for a while, eyes closed and unmoving. ]

(while venti wisps lie on the cloth, jinx makes no effort at all to try and disturb him. at least not right now, anyway. she did the same when it came with silco, quite honestly. she held herself in the brig with the jar she made as a token for who knows how long -- not like she was keeping time. for now though, she moves a few things over before tugging herself up on the counter. from there, she sits with occasionally reaching to him for a few head strokes.

if only there was something else she can do for him. her mind races on what exactly should that be. would singing be helpful? would he even be in the mood to hear it? jinx isn't all too familiar with the 80s music on this boat except the ones she finds are catchy. could that be of some help?)

Hey, I know you can't really... talk right now. But if you ever want to, y'know, later, I'll be here to listen. Always remember that, okay?

[ for a long moment it seems as if he didn’t hear her at all or doesn’t feel like responding.

then, a small nod. and then he curls up further against the fabric, as if it could still be warm, as if the owner could possibly be… somewhere. maybe he should be stronger than this, maybe he should really have gotten over this two thousand years ago. but it’s a wound that has never stopped paining for that long. he’ll just stay here maybe for the rest of the day, if she leaves him here or takes the box elsewhere, he’ll just stay in the box. ]

(as moments pass, jinx definitely realizes that yeah, he is not moving from this spot any time soon. which then leaves her to ponder what's the next choice of action. sure, she can just leave him here but would that be a safe thing to do? venti is well-known and liked but in this form, jinx isn't sure how many crewmates are aware of it. would someone harm him in this state? maybe not but... whose to say, really?

mizuki floats in her mind briefly as the next option. but then she also thinks would that help venti or damage him more? if her theory is right that this cloth belonged to his long lost friend, then mizuki with his voice... hm. it could either send venti into a spiraling mess or be comforting.

blowing air roughly through her nostrils, jinx hops herself off the counter then slips the bag hops of snacks in her arm. she turns to the box with the stillness wisp before very carefully picking it up to carry. maybe for now, the two of them can go to the theater -- at least there they can just have some privacy without anyone stumbling in. and from all spots on this boat, she likes to think the theater is the deadest next to the brig. or the morgue.)

Edited 2022-09-03 04:23 (UTC)

[ he’ll dizzily sleep through the rest of the day, practically dead to the world and whatever jinx might be up to. she’s a busy girl, surely she wouldn’t spend all her time babysitting a stupid depressed wisp like him. and in the meantime he simply drifts off into dreamless or hazy slumber, just barely touching on the memories of the desert.

it’s the next day, morning, when venti finally reforms back into his human self, still clutching the cloak still and tears lingering on his eyelashes as he curls up wherever jinx leaves the box. miserably asleep but maybe it’s better than miserably awake. ]

(if venti believes jinx is the type of person that would just dump someone somewhere and leave, he is half right. if it was an enforcer, someone she dislikes or have no care for, she would do that. but venti is an important person in her life and babysitting him is something she doesn't mind doing. after all, he had cared for her so many times and it's only right to do the same.

while he had been slumbering away in this said box, jinx had placed him on the stage and fiddled with the stage lights so it would dim. she set it just enough so it wouldn't be jarring for sleeping. as for her, she went up on her deck then kicked one of the mattresses off. why? because it'd be hard to keep an eye on him if she was hanging above when he was such a small thing. and once she managed to place it on the stage as well, jinx settled in and went into her own slumber.)

(it is certainly morning and it's a race on who wakes up first. jinx usually relies on ekko or rin to wake her up for breakfast but if they're nowhere near to do that, she won't wake up for it. and given she had been working late nights prior over her weapons, jinx will stay asleep until her body gets annoyed or ache.)

[ very eventually, after a week+ worth of sleepiness and worthlessness and just plain post-death depression, he does finally rouse, finding himself clutching the cloak and… ah, so that part wasn’t just a bad dream. it could be both a mercy and not, and yet when he looks down upon the clothing and feels the hollowness of his chest ache like it’d done so long ago, recalling the vision of that corpse that had dragged him down and clawed at him—

despite everything, he couldn’t want to give this up.

he wears it, drawing it quietly around his shoulders with a shudder. despite finally regaining human form it seems he doesn’t even really feel like crying, as if crashed through a boundary even of tears and heartache. he simply puts on the cloak, reaching fingertips vaguely to the chest wound of the torn fabric, bringing it away with flaked dried blood.

…

he goes to jinx at her bed and lies down next to her. exhausted not just physically, just spiritually and in all manner of the word completely. just curls up next to her with another shiver and lying beside her until she might wake. ]

(some days jinx is a light sleeper and other days a hard one. this particular time, she is sleeping pretty heavily. somehow the lightening of the stage lulls her and coaxes her into a slumber where her monsters are kept away. but she does feel the shift beside her and there's a slight stir. her eyes flutter lazily and then rolls to meet face to face of someone familiar.

just like before, she is quiet as she peers over. maybe she should start saying something but what words can be use? to say "everything will be okay" seems empty now a days. and it's hard for her to say such a thing when she often believes things will never be. jinx can only hope her presence will be enough for comfort to him because like him, she lost loved ones. some in death and some, well, relationships no longer in tact. with a weak smile, jinx reaches over to move a strain of his locks away from his eyes.)

... Hey.

Edited 2022-09-04 00:22 (UTC)

[ he watches her slowly rouse and… it’s almost painfully bittersweet how dear she’s become to him. it’s something he’s known for this long but sometimes, he just needs a reminder. that she’s taken care of him in her own way like this, stayed with him through so much, through his weakness—

at this moment he kind of forgets about ekko as well as he simply cuddles close to her; his body still cold, despite returning human. he presses his forehead to hers, eyes fluttering half-closed. ]

… Thanks for staying with me, Jinx. [ when he was a voiceless wisp. when he didn’t feel like doing anything but sleep. he still feels that way, but he supposes he really has to try to face reality. ]

(she expected him to be close to her but not exactly like this. although, she also feels him doing this is an exception. mizuki and ekko would understand, right? he is currently hurting and who would just leave someone in pain like this? ... well, she has the capability of abandoning someone in their time of need. and if she was the jinx from many, many months ago - she would had done just that. look out for yourself. that's what she was taught.

but venti, who is her first friend, softened her cold heart and truly he is the blame to why she cares for others so much. of course, she tends to get carried away with that "care" and it gets twisted into knots with questionable and concerning acts from her. but in it's core, jinx just loves and cares so deeply for her favorite people. she wants them to smile and experience happiness. and she wants to bring them those feelings whether it's from herself or something she can physical give.

so whenever they're like this, down or upset - her immediate thoughts are to hurt who or what hurt them. is it drastic? definitely. but it's only right to behave that way - it's a natural reaction, she thinks. but with this. there's no one she can charge at (besides friday) so there's not much she can do to make his pain go away but... be here beside him.)

(as he cuddles close, she can feel his cool temperature - which makes she shift a little more to wrap an arm around him for warmth. and as their foreheads press, she shuts her eyes too with a soft hum.)

Mm... — You know I always will if you need it. It's okay to... fall apart sometimes. I won't think of you any less for it. You're still gonna be my friend, I'm still gonna pray, and believe in you.

[ her words mean more to him than he knows how to say. and when he’s usually someone rather quick on the uptake, someone who’d like to think of himself as swift with words and even thought, someone who could often talk or act before thinking… the rather sluggish brain fog curled over him is just difficult. it’s what he’d want to stifle with alcohol until he passes out. it’s what he’d want to sleep away for maybe fifty years.

but he supposes he can’t do that. he struggles through trying to simply think, through misery, as his fingers clutch to the cloak. ]

This…

It belonged to my friend. [ every word rather slow, dragged out of him with the strained tone of his voice. ] I… didn’t think I would ever see something of his again.

But I did see him, or his undead self… or the vision of it in the desert.

[ it probably was a trick. it couldn’t possibly be the actual body of him. but it almost didn’t matter. ]

Edited 2022-09-04 04:47 (UTC)

(so her theory was correct but she didn't feel any less thrilled figuring it out on her own. jinx steadily moves her head -- her lips press sweetly on his forehead as she stares off... to nowhere in particular in the theater behind him. her hand now caressing his back; nails lightly dragging along to give little scratches for further soothing.

breathing in and slow breath out, she speaks almost in a whisper:)

You know he isn't suffering, right? He's at peace. — Try not to... linger on that fact if you are. From what you've told me of him, I think... he would be so proud of you with what you've done so far and he would never hurt you. Ever.

… I think you’re right. [ this, in a whisper. and the way he curls in towards her practically like trying to make himself smaller, like the form of the wisp that he is, his original self, when this very body of his is an imitation. a shadow and memory of his friend. ] You’re probably right. What I admired about him most was his conviction, his willingness to give all of himself to freedom. Maybe he had no regrets for his life.

But I do.

I’m the one who can’t let go. [ not for thousands of years. and it was the purest and worst weakness of him, that he never seemed to be able to resolve after so much time and wine, wine enough to send him into oblivion over and over again and yet it did nothing to salve or cure. ]

(it's unfortunate that the saying "time heals all wounds" can't work in this situation because he is living proof that the pain is still raw even after so many years.)

... And maybe the reason why you couldn't was 'cuz you haven't taken the right steps to. All those years, you've dealt with it on your own, right? Kept it inside and all that. But now, you're with us. A lotta of us care for you and... whoever you've told this to, we want you to heal and... feel better.

So. Maybe you can start takin' this whole thing the right direction and we can go through this progress with you together. If... that'll help any.

[ nothing she’s saying is wrong, and yet there’s both a muted sense of despair and a feeling almost of resigned finality. he’d spent more than two thousand years chasing after the memory of this one person, unwilling to give it up. ] I…

I suppose, I don’t… I don’t know how to do that. [ and he’s aware it sounds ridiculous, even to himself. so long lived, wanting to guide others and help others and having no clue how the hell to help himself, other than alcoholic self medication. he puts his face in his hands. ] Even… what I told you about Mr Silco. That I know some losses can’t heal but might fade with time. I, I don’t know why, but I can’t seem to… [ maybe he’s just unhelpable. he has no idea. this is exactly what fucks him up with mizuki. it was almost exactly what led him to his death, almost willingly dragged down by the undead. ]

(with her lips already resting on his forehead, jinx adds just a little pressure to it -- a light kiss. her hand moves away from his back but to place on his shoulder to tug away from their closeness. there's a small gap now but close still so the two of them can look at one another face to face.)

We can figure it out together. Since... well, I'm grieving, too.

(will it help him? she's not entirely sure. is he destined to be damned to this ache? whose to say. but maybe offering this, he wouldn't feel as alone in this journey.)

[ it’s true, they both are. and he hadn’t really wanted to bring up his mourning of thousands of years when she’d experienced silco’s death, but maybe if they could understand this much about each other…

it’s some amount of solace, being with her. he just nods mutely, not quite in the mood to talk much at all anymore, reaches to her hand to hold quietly. just wanting this touch and reassurance that they’d shared before.

the cloak feels terribly heavy on him. the torn area around the chest wounds almost as sharply as if fresh on his body. but somehow he feels a little less alone. ]

(as their hands meet, her fingers entwine with his -- the smile is small but warm. the kind that's reserved for certain people in her life. and it's okay if he no longer wishes to talk and jinx would definitely not push him to say anymore than he needs to. jinx is perfectly fine doing all the talking while he listens. in fact, sometimes her prayers to him do end up in rambles. maybe one day she'll ask him if that bothers him.)

You're stronger than you think.

(something her sister had said to her when she was younger. her voice so very faint these last two months and jinx wonders if she'll ever hear it clearly again.)

Matter what, we stick together.

[ he’d never actually thought of himself as strong, but it was what he admired about others most of all. his friend, for leading the rebellion. everyone else in that war, for giving their all and their lives. jean, lumine, diluc, everyone he knows, even zhongli and raiden… he does honestly think of them as having more conviction than he himself does.

he admires that about jinx, too, as he gently squeezes her hand. ] I’ll try. We can try together, then. [ his eyes close as he buries his face to her pillow, finally letting a few tears slip free, a long shuddering breath. it’s hard, it’s so hard. even after thousands of years. ]

Thank you, Jinx.

(with a warm smile, she brings up her free hand to lightly wipe the tears from his cheek. jinx leans in again to plant yet another small kiss on the forehead before settling more in next to him. )

Of course. (her tone kind, tender, and soft. a deep breath from out of her nose as she shuts her eyes, too. maybe if she relaxes her muscles and her mind, venti can as well in his own pace.)

Wanna make today an "us" day? We can lie here and talk. You can watch me work if you want later. Or I can put one some music? I don't have a lotta recorders but... I got one from Zaun that's not as wild.

[ he sniffs a little pathetically. ugh, how pitiful is this… but the way he curls a little under the cloak, clutching it as if it might be the most precarious thing in the world to him, is just—he just needs this, for now. his head hurts a little with misery but even he knows he needs to try to pull himself out of this.

slowly. he summons a small, tentative smile. ] Mm, sure we could do that. Music, or I’ll just watch you work. [ music really is the love of his life, whether or not he might be in a singing mood. ]

What might you be working on now?

(well with that being said, it looks like "jinx and venti/baratos" day is a-go. so for a moment, she raises up from the mattress and gives her body a stretch -- arms over her head with a light twist.)

The desert had a lotta cars so I rip some of 'em to pieces to gather the parts. I'm makin' guns. They're not for me, though. Two of my caps asked to make some for 'em.

(finish stretching, jinx walks on over to the curtains of the stage to yank out her gramophone. and luckily to save herself work, the recorder of choice is already set up. all she needs to do is turn it on and let it play.)

I just gotta design it a lil' more and I'd be through.

I think I say this a lot, but your mechanisms always really amaze me—

Wait, two captains? [ ??? well he knows about stede vaguely he supposes, but she probably isn’t talking about the eterna captain is she. The Captain. maybe so?? she’d talked to him once at that dinner but that was it, was it?? ]

Will you design them to be like fish or monkeys?

Yeah! Curly and Basilica the Raven! But everyone knows 'em as Stede and Izzy. I'm in their crew and they've been givin' me strict orders!

(she smiles to him over her shoulder -- even makes an attempt to wiggle her nose at him (she can't do it so she just looks goofy) then sits back down in front of the instrument.)

I'd do that buuut they don't seem like the type who would be interested in those designs. It's more like a "me" thing, anyway.