FEBRUARY EVENT: RIDE THE CYCLONE

[sailmods]

[during her morning announcements on the 9th, Friday helpfully informs everyone that anyone wishing to go out during this weekend’s excursion can exit the ship through the metal detector on deck zero starting at 10AM sharp. it is the early birds, the punctual ones, who will bear this moment witness.

because, as they arrive, they may notice that Friday isn’t standing where she was the last time, behind the metal detector, ready to see them through; today, that role is apparently being filled by Jenny. and she looks slightly different than normal.

she’s standing in front of the metal detector, as if first in line, and though her clothes and hair remain the same, there is some sort of pendant hanging heavy around her neck, metal inscribed with something too small and fine to really make out at this distance. her face turns towards Jenny for a long moment, and after what appears to be an encouraging smile… she steps through the metal detector, vanishing instantly.

Jenny gives anyone who’s there a wry grin and shrugs.]

This thing works by itself. Y’know, like everything else. But, she was letting anxiety get her all worried about it, trying to talk herself out of it…

[a laugh, and she crosses to the metal detector.]

See you bastards on the other side! [her head turns back, and a final grin.] Don’t worry. It’s easy! Just one small step and a bitch of a headache!

[she steps through the metal detector.

should you join her then, or at any other point during the weekend, it really is as easy as all that: step through the metal detector, and you will find yourself instantly stepping out onto the stamped-flat grass and dirt paths of a rural carnival, all fried food and loud games and rides that seem held together with bubble gum and hope. the first few seconds in this new reality bring the distinct feeling that your brain had just been cored by a fireplace poker, but it passes soon enough, and you can allow yourself to enjoy the fair's amenities however you wish.



particular attractions include…

THE TUNNEL OF LOVE



if any of you fuck in this thing I am closing the game immediately

THE HALL OF DOORS



like a hall of mirrors, but with doors! so many doors. nothing else. just doors. the doors open up to more doors, and then some more doors, until a door leads out. hopefully. probably.

BIG OL’ FUCK-OFF HUGE SLIDE WHAT YOU RIDE A BURLAP SACK DOWN



the burlap gives you absolutely zero protection from how boiling hot this thing gets in full sun!

THIS GODDAMN THING

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the fair will run every day from Thursday to Sunday, from 10am to 12am, closing at 5pm on Sunday. however, this does not mean you can’t go to the fair outside these hours; it simply means that the fair will be dark, the rides not running and the music out, like someone cut the electricity at midnight on the dot. you can still be there, of course, passing freely between the ship and the fair until it ends. you just might have a bad time.

in fact, you might have one during fair hours. see, there’s something a little bit… it’s hard to put your finger on it, but something seems off. every once in a while, mostly when you’re in a particularly precarious position -- standing on top of the slide, leaning over the deep fryer… you think you feel something like small hands low on your back, giving you just the slightest of pushes. at first. as the weekend continues, the shoves become a bit more forceful; by Sunday afternoon, you can be knocked clear off your feet by one.

and then there’s that guy.

the first day or two, you might not pay much attention to the figure just at the corner of your vision. it could be another passenger, after all, and you’re having much too much fun at the fair. by Saturday night, though, the figure has seemingly fully manifested. no longer just out of sight, it’s now fully visible. and coming your way. fast.

should the creature happen upon you, it will chase you. this will continue for as long as you run from it. should you stop, it will get within five feet of you before disappearing entirely. should you turn and chase it in stead, it will start to run from you, only to disappear when you get within five feet.

…

be sure to stop by on Saturday afternoon for the pet costume contest!]

Comments

2.

[theweakhavepurpose]

Pratt leans over the side of one of these Kamikaze spinning rides to look at her. "You uh... wanna come inside?"

He sounds kind of casual for seeing someone just clinging to the outside of a ride that probably isn't even that safe on the inside either. But this isn't the first time Pratt's been on this one, or the second, or fifth, it's the thirty-third time. He might also be living it up while he can. It's hard to be a thrill seeker on a ship where he can't really do much without Tommy Bahama suddenly starting to carry hang-gliders or bungee cords.

Re: 2.

[seethesun]

"I think if I try I might get hit by it, sir!" Eleanor's laughing, having the time of her short life right now. This is even better than combat was! She clings to the outside of the ride with no fear of falling, exulting in the wild thrill of it.

Shouting so she can be heard: "I do not think we've had the pleasure yet! Eleanor Lamb, deep sea diver!"

[theweakhavepurpose]

He actually laughs cuz that's great, "Safer out there huh?"

He's almost a little jealous, maybe he should have crawled outside the ride too, it didn't even occur to him.

"Deputy Pratt!" He shouts back as the ride completes its first full three-sixty loop and he gets jostled around, "What do you dive for in the sea?"

Just a casual convo as this thing starts to pick up speed.

[seethesun]

Ah shit her lie has been investigated in even the most basic manner. Quick, quick - got it!

"Biological samples! Deep sea flora and fauna, Officer, for the advancement of science." Nailed it. "Though here I mostly just crawl along the underside of the ship for fun, as it were. I was fortunate to take my suit with me when I arrived."

[theweakhavepurpose]

It's effective! "Oh sick. That sounds awesome. You get to be the cool people who see googly eyed octopi and laugh at them."

That's definitely what science is all about. "Is there anything outside the ship? I thought it was just water."

He braces himself in the cabin of the ride as it makes a few revolutions, He's been on this one enough times to know where all the rough parts are. About to be an expert on this carnival by the end of the week.

[seethesun]

Eleanor's own grip outside the ride tightens, white-knuckling it, but from the looks of things the motion of the hammer is sucking her to it rather than trying to fling her off. Practical physics lessons with a deep sea creature! Surely this will not cause any redneck engineering in the future.

Surely.

"There is a few facsimile barnacles, and I did find a dead body!" Eleanor stops her own train of thought to whoop with joy as the ride takes her upside-down, and then: "Miss Starr identified him as Moon Master Ebalon!"

[theweakhavepurpose]

They are going to be absolute menaces to the concept of safety in the future after this.

"Oh! That's --" Gotta suck in a breath as the wind is knocked out of him by the bar across his lap that keeps him from slamming head first into the ceiling, which is now the floor. But he grins because this is the best part because it's right before ---- He cheers as it gives a sudden drop to the side picking up speed as it gets to the bottom. "That was you!? That's awesome! Ebalon was kinda a dick, but his body was super useful!"

That's a normal thing to say right?

[seethesun]

Super useful huh. Good thing Eleanor's already screaming from the ride or the sound she lets out might be suggestive of shock and rage. Instead, since we're already telling lies, she's going to lie further: "How did that work out? Miss Starr was quite insistent on taking custody of his body."

[theweakhavepurpose]

Pratt, totally oblivious to the lies that are happening because he can't actually see her from in here, just keeps on blithely digging this hole deeper. "Eh, we learned some stuff from it, but I guess we need more than a corpse. I dunno what the problem is, he's kinda a hot twink, what's wrong with being a hot twink..."

Necromancy should be easier if the body in question is attractive. That's just how magic works right?

"Was there anything else cool down under the ship?"

[seethesun]

"Not really!"

Not nearly enough time. Thankfully the ride itself has Eleanor's back, giving her a free excuse to figure out what in that wild ass description to focus on. She can't let the Deputy figure out that she wasn't in on this.

Which is why, when the ride slows down, he gets: "Excuse me officer, what is a twink and why might a py wish to be one?"

[theweakhavepurpose]

Boy is he going to feel real awkward when he realizes this is a teenager he's talking to.

"He's just a hot scrawny dude. And we were thinking that might help but uh... nah. Oh well. Was worth a try." He shrugs, waiting for the ride to stop so he can get out. "What'd Ava trade you for him?"

[seethesun]

"She answered some questions I had as a new arrival, in rather large detail. Even suggested I speak to the Captain, though I've not yet made the time or quite found the courage. Have you?"

Gentle topic change, gentle.

Geeentle.

You know, while on the kamikaze ride.

[theweakhavepurpose]

"Yeah I've talked to him a few times. Everyone claims he's this evil guy torturing us but he's kinda just... a dude. He looks like a regular guy, you know?" He pushes the bar away and hops out of the ride as it comes close to a stop, he only wobbles a little bit because he's more used to being in motion than not.

"I'm starting to think maybe he shows up to everyone else as some monster with ten thousand teeth."

[seethesun]

So here's the thing: Eleanor has been clinging to the side of the hammer, and she keeps doing that when Pratt opens the door she's holding. She turns her head and flashes him a wild grin through it, dangling safely over maybe three feet of empty air but very much enjoying the silliness of being on the door.

"Surely then if they all learned dentistry he would be defeated?"

[theweakhavepurpose]

He grins back because he can just sense the vibes of a fellow thrillseeker (though he doesn't have the ability to leap over things while screaming like a banshee).

"Damn that's the thing we didn't try!" He leans against the railing to get his bearings again and make his head stop spinning. "People have tried punching him, fighting him, playing games.. no one has tried forcing him into a six month dental cleaning regimen."

[seethesun]

"Floss, the weapon that will slay even the gods." Eleanor drops down to the dust and just kinda hunches; with a good look at her, Pratt might notice her limbs are just a bit off; too long in the arm and leg, elbows and knees just not quite in the right spot. Like someone started making a girl, included too much Girl in it, and just let it ride.

[theweakhavepurpose]

He eyes her, briefly wondering if she was built in the character creator of an MMO that forgot to set parameters for their sliders and someone went balls to the wall on limb length. But considering all the other people he's met that doesn't even seem that strange right now.

"I think the real key to beating him is to just catch him by surprise so he doesn't even realize what's happening. Confuse the fuck out of him so he doesn't notice people have escaped. Just need a good distraction or whatever."

[seethesun]

"Hrmm." Eleanor is giving it serious thought. "That does make some presumptions, Officer - a means of egress, and a lack of automated defenses among them. Though I doubt the Captain is employing anything so crude as torpedoes, the principle is the same, yes?"

[theweakhavepurpose]

"I'm sure one of the magic folks here can like.. blast a hole in the barrier somehow. I dunno how that shit works, magic isn't real in my reality. I'm sure someone's working on it. Probably." He shrugs, pushing his hair back from his face, "I don't really want to leave so haven't been looking into it that hard."

[seethesun]

Curiosity and sympathy war on Eleanor's face, and curiosity wins. She bounces ahead to pick up a pair of cotton candy sticks, one of which she offers to Pratt in a transparent bribe not to flee the conversation. "That seems like it would not be a majority opinion, officer. Whyever would you not want to leave?"

She doesn't know people can be dead before they come here, you see.

[theweakhavepurpose]

Eleanor uses: SUGAR, it's very effective. "Oh fuck yes. Thanks."

This man is 60% sugar, 30% caffeine, 10% nicotine. He picks pieces up with his fingers, popping them in his mouth and letting the fluff dissolve on his tongue.

"Oh, cuz back home I'm dead. Also there was a nuclear apocalypse, along with a cult, and if I went back now the people who survived would kill me on sight unless Sharky does a whole presentation about how I'm not gonna murder them. With like an easel and flow charts. They'd probably GPS tag me like an endangered wolf." Which he says casually because that would actually be smart on their behalf. "Also there is so much food here. And I was starved for a really long time so... Would rather stay where the food is, and a bed, and doors that lock, and no Jacob Seed, also a bunch of people can turn into wolves and that's the only good part from home. The wolves I mean, not people who can turn into them because we don't have that."

As far as he knows anyway.

[seethesun]

Eleanor presses her hands together as if in prayer. The cotton candy held between them really fucking spoils the effect, but she's got the spirit. "Officer, we have some concerning things in common. But! Since you've been here far longer than me that means you can answer a question that has been at the forefront of my mind since entering this carnival: what, pray tell, is the best food here that will not be on the ship?"

[theweakhavepurpose]

"Funnel cake." There isn't even a hesitation there. He's done this research, he is an expert. "There's a ton of weird fried shit that's like novelty stuff you should try like Deep fried oreo's. But for legit good food that isn't on the ship? It's funnel cake, hands down."

He licks some of the sugary stuff off his fingers, "Also, kinda a bad thing if you have anything in common with me? All the stuff about me is pretty bad so like.. that's not great for you."

[seethesun]

"I had noticed," Eleanor says flatly. "...My former home endured a famine as well, among other things. I was always fed, and yet here...it feels often as if I've never known what food really is."

[theweakhavepurpose]

"Right? The food here is so much better. Maybe cuz it's free or I dunno.. something about it makes it better than back home." He shrugs, he doesn't know why the mashed potatoes here just hit different, but he's not gonna question it.

"C'mon, lets get you some funnel cake."