come_sailaway | 10th Contraption: Mawwiage

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10th Contraption: Mawwiage

Who: John Watson, Johnny Summer, and César Salazar with Rich Goranski, Fio, and Honoria Crabb AND YOU Oh god why are weddings like this
What: The throuple getting married by... the Captain?!
When: December 11th at 7pm
Where: John's
Warnings: I believe in us! But for now, nothing.

SEATING

John's has been transformed, the seating up front rearranged in rows towards the center dias with an aisle down the middle, the piano moved off to one side. The buffet for later can be seen off to the other. Decorations taken from Spirit Halloween appear here and there–flowers taken from cavalera flower crowns, sun and moon candlestick holders from the tarot collection, festively colored tablecloths draped down the walls like curtains or banners. A sign near the entrance says "seat yourself", although the front row on one side is reserved with a ribbon across the backs.

What can't be seen is who is officiating. Or the husbands, but at least that part makes sense. The dais is empty.

THE CEREMONY

As one of the few traditions in this wedding, music announces the start of the ceremony. Rich strolls in first, trying to look professional even if he’s clearly shaking a bit as he holds the small pillow with the rings laid on it. At least he’s dressed quite smartly, Johnny ensuring his red suit is wrinkle free and his cuff links are set in place. Fio, in a winged black dress and flowery headdress, follows after the ring bearer, adorning the path with paper petals as she moves along.

The first husband to be down the aisle is none other than Johnny, in a smart charcoal grey suit with a goldenrod pocketsquare, gold jewelry, and a wreath of orange blossoms on his head; and accompanied by Honoria Crabb in her perfectly tailored black tuxedo, worn with black gloves and a white bow tie. Watson and César take up the rear, arms linked together. César is wearing an equally fancy suitcoat with his tie held in place with a ruby and silver tie pin, and Watson is wearing an officer’s dress uniform, with the sword and without the helmet, and also his good cane. All three husbands-to-be are wearing green carnation boutonnières.

AFTER PARTY

It's time to eat, dance, and party!

The seating has been rearranged for sitting at tables around the "dance" floor. Food from Windjammer has been placed on some tables for a buffet. There’s a selection of fancy cheeses and crackers, sushi, premade sandwiches, and salad with dressings on the side. For dessert, to one side there’s a table with cupcakes, cookies, and chocolates arranged in a heart. On the bar are a couple bowls of punch (including one explicitly labeled as non-alcoholic) made by Johnny ahead of time, because he's been forbidden to bartend his own wedding, much to his deep chagrin.

There’s a space set just off the dancefloor for musicians who wish to perform, the usual John’s piano (bribed into behaving with a whole pan of beef brisket from the buffet) off to one side.

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He is already regretting letting the inside thoughts be outside thoughts now. He didn't mean to attract this much attention to it.

"Do I look that old to you?" A beat. "Don't actually answer that." He was upset enough already that he found some grey hairs on his head. Thank God Arthur won't ever see them.

"No, I'm not a damn vampire." He scrubs his hands down his face. He knows Klaus is just trying to lighten the moods but... agh.

"I don't know how old I am anymore. Okay? It was 1999 on Earth when I left it, but I have no clue how long I've been out in space. And, what's even worse is I don't know how long it's been on Earth compared to how long it's been for me." Time dilation; his greatest fear is that it's already been too long and even if he did manage to make it home, it would be to an entirely new Earth with all his family long dead.

"I just... have to guess. I'm probably somewhere in my early thirties. Thirty-three maybe."

Klaus bumps his shoulder with his own. "What? eight hundred and twenty-two years young, Crichton." He laughs a little at that, unaware of gray hairs, but he's sure he has a few of his own he's not paying attention to.

"Disappointing. I mean not really. I don't know a lot of vampires. I'd probably let one bite me, though." He offered to Diana forever ago. She never took him up on it, though.

"Sounds rough, buddy." But they get it. Time is a fucking weird creature. "Like I technically turned thirty in October, right? But in my brain, I still feel like I should have turned like thirty-six? But I lost all the extra years when the time reset, so I'm technically not...that." They shrug, leaning against Crichton for a moment. "Happy birthday, though. For real. I'll sing to you later when we're not at a wedding and you wouldn't probably feel awkward about it." Until then....guess you will have to deal with Klaus hugging you, Crichton. "My gift to you is...not singing. I can win you something from the arcade later. From the little claw machine."

"Klaus..." Crichton groans. Of course, he'd be into vampires and biting. He's heard enough stories out of Nobunaga, he can't be that surprised.

"It's weirdly comforting to know I'm not the only guy going through this kind of... I don't know what to call it." Is not being able to say for sure how old you are a crisis?

"But thanks. I really don't want to steal attention away from the grooms. This is their day."

He'll take the hug, however, with an enthusiastic squeeze back. "Are you actually good at those claw games? I can't get a damn thing out of them."

There's a fake innocent look. "Whaaaat?" It's so funny to see how weird people get about things. But only when they are friends and probably used to it. Except when sometimes they're new people, but it's fine.

"Glad to be able to help, buddy." At least there's something about their weird life that can help others feel better about their weird life stuff.

"I don't think they'd even notice, honestly, but you're a big softie, so I understand." Welcome to the light cuddling part of the wedding party from your friend who is having a lot of weird feelings very silently and so needs so many hugs.

"I spent hours getting something for Ava and I almost fought a machine. I got her this cute mushroom plush. But even if we just play it together and have fun and never win anything, it'll be fun, right?"

"I'm a big softie?" He's trying to sound offended but... dammit if Klaus isn't right about that. And dammit if he doesn't love this closeness. He's always been the type to find comfort in touch.

"Sure. It'll be fun just to hang out. If we get too frustrated, I could always just shoot the damn thing too." Not really. Unless?

Klaus laughs. "Yeah, buddy. You are. I mean, we're hugging at a wedding right now. I bet you either cried or almost cried during the ceremony." They lower their voice before. "Don't worry. Me too." It's probably a good thing Crichton found one of the other people on this ship that likes physical closeness almost all the time.

They consider the suggestion. "I mean, it would probably fix itself and maybe we could loot it until we accidentally turned around and it was fixed again."

"Don't call me out like that, dude." Got him. Absolutely nailed it. Softies need to stick together.

"You know, you have a point. But I want to see you put your skills to the test first. Then we can shoot it and loot it." Look at that, he rhymed. He's a poet and didn't know it.

"You know what else I've always wanted to try down there? That dancing game. It looks like fun but I didn't want to be the loser dancing alone on it." He means the DDR machine.

"Sorry, but if I don't...who will?" Probably someone, honestly. But still! Also it's good to know they are not the only one that got emotional. They also got emotional at Luther and Sloane's wedding.

"I'm glad you understand how excellent I am at making valid points." A little nod before they laugh. "Way to rhyme, buddy, but okay. I'll try to use my super cool skills and when that gets to be too much, just shoot it and we'll be fine."

As for the dancing game. "Oh yeah. The DDR thing. We have those back home. Still no cell phones, but DDR, sure..." Things are weird, right?

"You know I'm dating Arthur, right?" Arthur will absolutely always call him out. Bless that man.

"I'm learning poetry. Work in progress." Learning it from Klaus's boyfriend. All the boyfriends up in this place.

"Yeah, those things. I think I might have seen one in an arcade, maybe. But I never gave it a try. You really didn't have cell phones? Not even Nokia?" Yes. Nokia. The height of technology in 1999.

"I mean, yeah. I know that." A beat. "But now it's even cuter that you're just talking about it normal." Just gonna squish your cheeks...as a friend. And he means the ones on your face.

"Poetry club?" Cause they know about poetry club, but that doesn't mean they've attended. It's just not their thing. And it's good for Nobunaga to have some things that he doesn't attend. So they're not constantly around each other all the time probably making everyone in the general vicinity varying layers of uncomfortable.

"I can't even remember when they were invented." They didn't have one at the house. It wasn't like Reginald Hargreeves was gonna let them have things that were fun. HA! As if. "What's Nokia?"

"I know, I know. It took us a while to get there. Still not ready to get explicit about it, if you know what I mean?" No garlic ass-eating jokes still, is what he means.

"Yep. I let Arthur drag me to one and Nobunaga was so happy to see me there I didn't have the heart to quit showing up." The things he does for friends and lovers.

"Nokia are considered the most reliable brand of cellular phones. You're supposed to be able to drop them a bunch and they won't ever stop working. But they are nothing like the ones we have on this cruise."

“Yeah yeah yeah. No butt stuff.” Klaus isn’t super stressed about it. It’s fine for him because shame is like non existent. “You can still make jokes about me, though. Mostly cause I’m definitely gonna find that shit hilarious.”

They nod. “Nobunaga is very excited about these things. I’m more of a musical poetry kind of person. Valdis and Nobunaga were haikuing at each other the other day before we had sex and I just sort of existed to hear that. I cannot haiku, so it was almost like being left out of a neat trick, but not enough that I think I want to go to poetry club.” Just a little casual mention of something that happened like it’s not a thing.

Klaus considers the answer, which sounds like an ad or something. “Huh. Yeah, none of that. Just landlines and phone booths for us.”

Crichton glances around, checking to see if there's anyone who might be listening too close (sorry Phil) before he very quietly, very bashfully says, "Klaus, I might need you to..." God, can he really ask this? "Part of the problem is I don't... have much experience with... that stuff." Butt stuff. Frell. He's going to die of embarrassment right here. This was a mistake! "You know what. Never mind. Forget I said that."

Wait, what did Klause just say? "I hope by 'we' you only mean you and Nobunaga and not Valdis too? I mean. I guess she might be into that but..." he really can't picture it. (And he really doesn't want to.)

Klaus looks at Crichton quietly for a moment. “No no. We don’t have to talk about it here, but…uh…if you want to, we can go off somewhere later.”

There’s a hint of a smirk here. “What? You don’t think she’s into threesomes?” The amusement is very obvious on their face at this point. “Yeah, sorry, buddy. I can’t help you. Cause yeah. I do not mean just us two.”

"Maybe later..." he hesitantly agrees. Maybe. Or, maybe he will just make a hasty early exit with Arthur before later arrives.

"She didn't strike me as that... no," unless he died right here and now and then later won't come until at least a day after. He's fighting not to put his face in his hands. "G-good for you guys. I guess Yato really can make wishes come true..." Stop looking at him like that!

Klaus will definitely walk him through things. He'll even probably do it like...not like a weirdo. Probably. As long as Nobunaga's not there, it should go fine.

"Huh. I mean...it was a weird mood for the day, but..." There's a shrug and very nearly a laugh as they look at Crichton's face. It lasts for a minute before there's a soft snort, followed by some more laughter. "Eh. It's the agreement. Nobunaga doesn't like the idea of me sleeping with other people unless he's involved and so we went with that. I guess I also don't like it either. Which is new. I'm not used to caring."

(This is much sadder now in retrospect.)

"Agreement? That's uh... well, I'm not gonna tell you your own business man, but that seems like a weird middle ground. But maybe that's just me. Personally, I'm not sure I'm up for having that kind of, what do people call it, open relationship?" He should probably have that conversation with Arthur at some point. But they haven't even gotten that far with each other yet.

(It’s so sad)

“That sounds like…the wording isn’t right. But we don’t want each other to sleep with other people unless we’re together. We talked about it before. I wanted to check something before I did it and wrecked things so early on. It definitely caused a minor hiccup and he told me I should date people to prove that he was the best aaaand I did not do that because that’s dumb for one and for two he was obviously trying to act like it was cool when it wasn’t and he wouldn’t be happy with it. I wouldn’t make him do something he wasn’t happy with. Not like that.”

Klaus shrugs. “Everyone’s different. You don’t have to do open or even maybe open to another person. Or polyamory or anything you’re not comfortable with. Just one of those conversations. When things are starting out.” There’s a pause before they say, “I honestly didn’t think he’d ever be actually interested cause he’s always saying his hands are too full with me. Thought it was just a thing we weren’t ever actually exploring, but he’s the one that suggested the threesome with Valdis.” They smile a little. “That’s not to say I didn’t agree or that I minded. Just surprised. Then again, Valdis is soooo hot.”

"Date other people...?" Sometimes, the things Nobunaga says...

"I don't know how you do it sometimes, man. You know I love the guy but he's a live wire. Makes me think there actually can be too much of a good thing because his passion sure does take him down some interesting logic paths." Maybe it's culture shock, he doesn't know, but man sometimes he just wants to shake the dude.

"I'll keep that in mind. I do need to find out where Arthur stands on it, but given the time period he came from I'm thinking he might be even less inclined to it than I am." But you never know...

"I'll give you that. She's smoking hot. But I also don't know if I'd trust her not to suck my soul out through my mouth when she got done with me."

"He gets weird when he's jealous sometimes." Klaus shrugs. "But I know a boundary when I see it. Even if he feels like he's confining me to give them to me. Worried about castes and things."

There's a small pause. "Well, mostly I guess I just...do my best. Talking about things and sometimes he says a lot...but...I dunno. We make it work." He's smiling a little. "Sometimes he does need a little logic shoved in his breain, though. And he's pretty stubborn. And misses things he should understand, but...so do I, I guess. And he does listen when I talk to him." There's a lot of things about Nobunaga that Klaus loves and even with the frustrating parts, they still want to make it work.

"Probably. He doesn't seem like an open relationship type? But I could be wrong. Still...it's good to like...talk about things and communicate. I try to do my best with it, but even I'm not perfect."

That gains a laugh. "I mean, I think she might, but it would be fine. And she doesn't usually take a lot of it. Just enough for healing. Except that...one time." But now he realizes that was like being high and he does feel a little bad for not seeing it at the time.

"I worry about that sometimes myself. His uh... hang-ups already got him in hot water with Arthur. First guy I ever had to come up with a conversational safeword for." He's still not sure if Arthur and Nobunaga have actually made up over that incident or if they are just both not talking about it. He doesn't want to kick the hornet's nest by asking. Crichton knows plenty about loving someone who's a little bit difficult at times.

"No one's perfect. Something we both gotta remember, right?" A little forgiveness and grace goes a long way.

"That one time...? You know what? I don't wanna know. Just as long as everyone's into it that's all I need to know. I'm learning my lesson about staying out of other people's private business." Is he, though?

"Yeeeaaaaah. We had a whole conversation about things. And him listening to me more. I'm usually the hottest mess in all my relationships, so this is new to me." Haha. This is a funny joke, right?

Klaus gives him a little smile. "Yeah. It's probably best not to like...get too caught up in all that stuff."

"That's a good start, anyway. Talking about it." Maybe being the responsible one will be good for Klaus too. He's not saying that out loud, though.

"Probably. On that note, I think I'll catch up with you more later. I gotta figure out where my disaster of a boyfriend got off to." Said with much affection. Surely, they get it.

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10th Contraption: Mawwiage

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okay with starting to wrap this one?

yes!

thanks! End~