come_sailaway | YOU'RE THE NEXT CONTESTANT

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YOU'RE THE NEXT CONTESTANT

WHO: the Captain + You
WHAT: contractually obligated price is right game
WHEN: 11/18, like nightish?
WHERE: Bellona Theater
WARNINGS: N/A, currently

[you've heard the announcement, the sound of Friday's cautious optimism as she spoke it. you've waited all day. now, it's time for the game.

the amount of effort that has gone into this production at Bellona can be safely defined as “minimal.” there are three podiums, with three slate boards and three pieces of chalk. there is another podium, currently empty, next to a plain folding table. there is a tablecloth draped over the table, covering a lumpy, inscrutable shape.

the most remarkable thing is the giant wheel set up on the other side of the empty podium. the slices of the giant circle are colorful, but also completely blank. the Captain actually spends 30 minutes prior to the start of the event simply sitting in front of it, back to the audience, and spinning it, listening to the loud clacking noise pick up and then die down again, before spinning it once more.

clackclackclack clack clack. clack. clackclackclackclackclack.

it's gonna be a long night.]

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Ugh. [GROSS. Not allowed or not, Nobunaga gives Klaus' shoulder a VERY hard bite.] Disgusting. [Growl growl growl.]

[And just gently kisses Klaus' neck where he bit it as he simmers back down towards calm.]

Well, you have to earn your name as a demon king. Ieyasu went through even more names. Let's see he was... Takechiyo Matsudaira. Then he was... Jirōsaburō Motonobu Matsudaira under Imagawa's command. [Reflexively, as ALWAYS, Nobunaga's right hand goes to the conqueror's blade hilt.] Then Motoyasu for his naming day ceremony. But he became Ieyasu when he was free. And Tokugawa by special permission of the Emperor. [Waves his hand.] Politics again. Everything is. [A gentle kiss to Klaus' spine.]

Hideyoshi isn't nobleborn. His childhood name was Hiyoshi-maru and no surname, no clan name. He became Hideyoshi Hashiba when he first decided to mother hen the whole army, literally made his name of parts of my other generals names, I'm not kidding. And then Toyotomi at the same Ieyasu became Tokugawa, because I told them both my ambition for Japan, and what I wouldn't stop at to achieve it. Once I finished, the plan was to give the country over to them both so I could sail away freely. Hideyoshi in charge of the army and popular with the people, and Ieyasu in charge of healing it and dealing with the noble side.

[Klaus makes a small, surprised noise before laughing.] No need to bite about your displeasure. [But the kiss is nice. He'll take that.]

[They listen as Nobunaga talks, trying to put things to memory and not zone out for a long minute at the amount of information at once. There's a lot of names to remember. Politics and names and freedom. They smile at the kiss.]

[Klaus smiles as he listens, a hand moving to take one of Nobunaga's.] It sounds like a lot of name changes. I'd get confused. But I hope that you...the version of you that's there still...gets to do that. Gets to see all your work come to fruition. Kipposhi. [He smiles a little.] That's such a cute name.

Then don't say stupid things.

[Face scrunch at getting called Kipposhi, and then a derisive snort.] It is not. It means... [More face scrunch.] Lucky star. Shut up. [Ugh. What a silly thing to be embarrassed about.]

[But he is.] Nobunaga is better. It means trust the length. Meaning of my ambition. Long term. Past my lifespan even.

What about Klaus? Didn't you have a naming ceremony too?

Can't seem to help myself. You just keep rewarding me.

[He smiles widely about the Lucky star.] Lucky four and lucky star. Matchy-matchy. [Yes, he's grinning very widely at this, waiting to be punished or not.]

Heh. [They are a fucking child] I trust the length of something. [IT WAS JUST WAITING TO BE SAID! BEGGING EVEN!]

Klaus? Uh. I dunno? Not really. I don't know what it means. I never got into that kind of thing.

[Just.... snickers.]

[Yes. YES.] The length of my length. [There is probably something happening on stage that Nobunaga may not want to miss BUT--]

Ah. You just trusted Grace then?

[Klaus isn't sorry about anything.] Yes. Exactly that.

[But his next question just gets a little nod.] I mean, who doesn't trust the only person that gives a shit about you after all? Parent-wise. She picked everything.

[Ehhhhh Don't get Nobunaga started on Gozen. In fact. He'll just skip over that entirely.]

Tell me more about her? [Snuggles.]

[He sighs.] She used to make us breakfast and every breakfast had a smiley face. Ever if it was eggs and bacon. She’d find a way to make a smiley face. [There’s a fond smile on their face as they recall it.]

She’d always ask how our day was and raise money for bail when I fucked up again. She just…I dunno was like those moms in a 1950s sitcom. Except she was also skilled in science and medicine. She saved Allison’s life after Viktor slit her throat. [A beat.] Accidentally of course. He just lost control a little. Happens to everyone.

A smiley face. [You just know Nobunaga's going to start doing that whenever he brings Klaus food now. Not cute though!]

You've mentioned sitcoms before, but I have no frame of reference for mothers in them versus the rest of society. I take it, it is because Reginald didn't have normal input and that was the easiest baseline for what mother figures were usually like?

Let's see: Luther, Diego, Allison, Klaus, Viktor, and Ben. There must have been a reason, but I suppose I'd have to ask her. We know it wasn't your birth mothers though.

Most of my siblings all chose Nobu names, honoring our father, Nobuhide. Nagamasu and Hidetaka were the only exceptions. Hidetaka got killed by Nobutsugu, the evil uncle I mentioned, early in the war. Oh yeah, even our cousins often had Nobu names because, the whole clan did. My grandfather, all my uncles. Let's see. Nobuyasu, Nobumitsu, Nobutsugu, Nobuzane. Then the women all have O-names. Oichi, Otsuya. Don't worry about remembering, it'll never come up. It's just how it is.

[Sorry. You spelled very cute wrong.] Yeah. Even as adults.

I don’t even know how to explain sitcoms. But like…always has dinner ready, always minding the kids, always smiling. Sometimes she showed other emotions, but I think she was just trying to keep us from feeling things as sharply. [They sigh.] Kind of hard not to, but I guess that’s what he felt was needed.

[Klaus nods.] I definitely couldn’t tell you why anyway. Oh! Except Viktor chose his name. Um. Viktor is like me. Only um not non-binary. Just a trans man. He just told us recently. Before the world ended. We didn’t really get a chance to talk about it, though. World ending and all.

[Sorry, but they are still gonna try to remember, Nobunaga. Because you mentioned it, so it might mean something to you. And he loves you, so…get used to it or whatever.] You know telling me not to do something is probably gonna make me do it more, right?

That is the exact opposite of Gozen. She was always strict, always irritated, extremely political, formal, very scathing. Well, I suppose Grace has to serve as a counterpoint to your father. Nonuhide was infamously soft-hearted, so Gozen never was.

Right, I remember you said that about him. Viktor.

[Kisses Klaus' cheek.] Don't be ridiculous. I barely remember my childhood anyway. Which is just as well. The days after my father's funeral were truly the worst of hell. I couldn't even tell you if Nobu-- tch... if my brother was influenced by my uncle or vice versa. But the second war with him... Gozen begged me to spare him the first time. The second time, I knew it was impossible so... [Huffs and burrows his face in Klaus' neck.] I don't even say his name anymore. Can't bear it. Could barely to say Kitsuno when drinking, and she didn't betray me.

You are actually the first person I've told I love, did you know? I couldn't tell her, she was so ill from the plague, it would have been cruel. Politics. And Gozen I don't love. Oichi... I had a hard enough time banishing.

I will be your lucky star though. [Stealthily laces fingers together!] So you can call me whatever you wish. So long as you call on me.

[Klaus leans back a little, wanting to comfort Nobunaga in this moment because it seems like he needs it.] I'm sorry you didn't get that experience. Childhoods really do suck, huh?

[They smile at the kiss to their cheek.] Oh, but I'm very ridiculous. That's why you love me. [He reaches back with one hand to lightly touch Nobunaga's hair as a means of comfort as he burrows his face in his neck. He deserves so much more than he believes he does. That's Klaus' very serious assessment.] I'm sorry, Nobunaga. I'll still remember because it's important. Even if I don't say their names. Your life is important and all the details and things that made you who you are now...are important. Even if they're shit.

[That does get a little hiccup in the old heart. The first person he's ever told he loves. It makes them stare ahead of themselves. This is a big deal. And him telling them is a big deal. As far as Klaus is concerned anyway.] I didn't know. [His voice is quiet.]

[As their fingers lace together, Klaus lifts their hands up, pressing a kiss to the back of his hand and then his fingers.] I keep thinking I can't love you any more than I already do and then you just...make me a liar. How do you keep doing that?

[Nobunaga instantly soaks in the snuggles!!! He didn't think things were all that bad, but he'll if he's not going to enjoy himself. And truthfully, he was a bit more bothered than he thought, only noticing the difference from the feeling of Klaus' comfort.]

I do love you. [A gentle kiss to Klaus' neck!]

[He gets so immensely flustered by Klaus' words though. Nobunaga is so important to Klaus even the little things Nobunaga considers unimportant, Klaus still regards highly.] You're important. Even being this ridiculous. My lucky number. [Another kiss! Chu!]

[And then a laugh at the question.]

I do enjoy achieving the impossible as inhumanly possible. Mufufufu.

My lucky number
So cute, and sweet, even fruit
Cannot quite compete.

[Nuzzle nuzzle.]

Edited (Phone tags with a migraine are ultimate hard mode lol) 2022-11-21 21:37 (UTC)

[Klaus is happy to make him feel better because it seems like not a lot of people were quite so soft with him over time. Which is a shame because Nobunaga probably needed a little. Even if it was probably not wise. With everything that happened back home for him. They hate to think that it was too dangerous to allow for softness, for caring.]

[They smile at the kiss.] Good. Cause I'd complain if you didn't.

Of course I'm important. [Are you proud of him? He didn't immediately and awkwardly avoid good words that were said in his general direction!]

[The poem is just...painfully cute. It's all heart eyes from here.] I love you so much. I'm sorry I don't have a poem.

[Literally no one was soft with Nobunaga EXCEPT Kitsuno, and even THEN she was very firm and had no choice but to a bit brutal considering the world, politics, and dying slowly from the plague.]

[Nobunaga beams and smirks at both the promise to complain and acknowledgement that Klaus is indeed quite important.]

[Good ex-cult leader.] I'll hold you that. [To complain and be important and know it.]

[And then just laughs and aims a kiss for Klaus' cheek again!]

Good. I can get overwhelmed when others give me poems back. I wound up singing in Windjammer when Valdis gave me her haiku about gods only die once. [:3 He regrets nothing.]

Good. Cause I mean it and you're gonna have to live with it. [He's very happy to just exist in this space, letting himself accept however many cheek kisses he's going to be given at any point in time.]

You sang because you got overwhelmed by a poem? [That makes them laugh.] Well now I have to write you a poem. But I'll wait till we're alone...and I'll make you sing for a different reason. [There's also no regrets. Oops, this is misbehaving.]

Klaus... [A deep low warning growl, because he's definitely in danger of forgetting any reasons to care about shared spaces and on the verge of his usual Demon King thing of "fuck societal prudish mores! Overhaul the whole structure and live freely!"]

[Grrrr...]

[A quiet rumble almost to the back of Klaus' ear:]

I'm looking forward to that.

[And then he takes a DEEEEEEEP breath and leans back, trying to stay as composed as he can get.] Venti also got a song out of me on the first excursion, and Uptown Girl later. He's fond of Billy Joel. His trick is also similar. If I get overwhelmed enough, I'll just do it. This is why I was called the fool lord in my youth. One of many reasons. [The bizarre personality...]

[That only gains a very amused smile from them. This is very clearly winning the game.] Yes??? [He affects an innocent look here. Very innocent. Has never misbehaved a day in his life.]

After this is over, I need to grab something, but I want you to go to the room and get ready. Also we should probably ask your roommate for privacy.

[Klaus goes with him, doing their best to stay also relaxed.] Should I be jealous? [He isn’t, but it’s funny to say it since he’s the one that’s expressly stated he’d be fine if Nobunaga slept around. Only he’s carefully aware that now that they’ve been so deeply open with each other about things and he’s gotten to know more, he would be uncomfortable with the possibility of him ending up with feelings for anyone else. Which they’ve honestly never experienced before. Or, at the very least, never thought about.]

[As if in response to nothing, Klaus carefully shifts before pulling both of Nobunaga’s arms around their waist] I lied before. [The words are quiet.] I don’t want you to be with anyone else either. Unless we’re together.

[Arches both eyebrows, and probably will have to stay seated like this for a little while now, thanks Klaus.]

[He was about to say something about the songs--]

[But gets instantly flustered, then amused by Klaus.]

[Okay another kiss for Klaus, even if he's failing miserably at being incredibly turned on again.] I shall let you in on a little secret, my Lucky Number.

[Chu!] I like having my hands full, but you have completely filled my hands. [Squeezes Klaus hips, but then drags a hand full of intertwined fingers up to kiss Klaus' knuckles with a predatory smirk.] You are all I can carry, and all I want to taste. I have not thought about anyone else, and I told you, I will break the voice in your head that lies to you and says you are not enough. You are exactly what I want, no more, no less. If you need to be free, I'll not restrict you, but --

[All blushy smiles.] I'm glad to hear you say that. I have no interest in others. I pursue one thing, and keep my hands full. I have no intention to set you down or pick up anyone else. [Hands go back on Klaus' waist and he kisses him hard on the lips. And they wonder why they have trouble keeping their hands off each other!]

[He still remembers the flash of his own temper, almost stabbing Sharky, but it's true, his hands full of Klaus. He can't bring himself to want something more, even before they were officially partner/boyfriend or exclusive.]

I still want you to have no regrets. To not look back at missed opportunities and wonder. But if these are your words then -- [A happy hum as he closes his eyes, and holds Klaus close, snuggling into his neck.] I will just make sure you enjoy this new thing even more instead, yes? [Best day ever.] And you needn't be jealous of Venti. He is like a baby brother. He did take me flying though. So you will have to keep up to keep challenging my expectations! [Laughs evilly but kisses another part with pure amusement.]

[They're doing this in front of a whole theater and Nobunaga cannot give a single fuck about that, because Klaus has all his fucks, yes.]

[Klaus is not sorry. Nope.]

[They do appreciate the kiss. Really any positive signs of affection.]

[He flushes a little at Nobunaga's words, not even sure why this of all things is making his face heat up. It's kind of stupid, honestly.] That was one of the hottest things anyone's ever said to me.

[And wow, he's somehow even cuter. How did that happen?] Good. Cause I'm not sure I could handle it if you somehow fell in love with someone else. [They shift again if only to make it easier to kiss back, mostly oblivious to everything else.]

I wasn't really jealous...I was just joking...cause I figure you'd have told me...if it was something. [He grins a little] Oh. You think I can't keep up? I'll show you! Only like...not right now.

I cannot imagine what circumstances could even make it possible for such a thing. I did not expect to love you so deeply either, after all. No. [A headshake.] I am quite certain no one could take your place. Not even other versions of you, as you say. You are my only Lucky Number, and that is what I want and need.

Yes. Show me, but not right now. [ALL THE GRINS, and gently pets Klaus' hair.]

I dunno. Just get anxious about it. I know it’s dumb. [Brains are dumb. They just want to cuddle about it.] I will fight myself to be honest if they even try it!

[He’s happy here. Just chilling.]

It's not that stupid. [All the snuggles for his cute partner!] As sexy as that might be to watch, I shall endeavor to give you no reasons to feel anything other than reassured that you are the best and quite loved. [Stupid blush. Shoo blush! SHOO!]

[He lets out a long breath before.] I believe you.

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YOU'RE THE NEXT CONTESTANT

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